


The Spaces Between You and I

by magma



Series: Babe, You Always Knew I Was Dangerous [1]
Category: Captain America (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Beefy Bucky, Bisexual Steve Rogers, Bottom Bucky Barnes, Captain America: The First Avenger, Dancing, Enthusiastic Consent, Face-Sitting, First Time, Gay Bucky Barnes, Implied Bucky Barnes/OMCs, Infidelity, M/M, Marathon Sex, Mentions of come inflation, Minor Slut Shaming Kink, Not Captain America: Civil War (Movie) Compliant, Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot, Post-Captain America: The Winter Soldier, Power Bottom Bucky, Pre-Captain America: The First Avenger, Rimming, Rough Sex, Top Steve Rogers, raunchy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-24
Updated: 2017-07-13
Packaged: 2018-11-18 09:39:31
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 34,953
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11288616
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/magma/pseuds/magma
Summary: The first time is confusing, overwhelming, and what Steve thinks is probably a very,verybad idea. The second time is confusing, overwhelming, and just what Bucky needs. The third time is just debauchery, with a hefty side of pining.(Porn teaser for Babe, You Always Knew I Was Dangerous/Pansy Craze, but easily stands alone. Previously titled 'like tonight's our only night')





	1. like tonight's our only night: Pre-War Steve/Bucky

**Author's Note:**

> Title and Summary edited 5/22/18 as I gear up for the main story.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning: Dubious Consent due to the influence of alcohol.

The stairs to their apartment had never seemed more tedious and wearisome as they did tonight.

Bucky was still leaning at least half of his obnoxiously heavy weight on Steve- his half pint of a friend who that jerk _knew_ could barely keep himself upright after half a pint ( _shut up, Bucky_ )- let alone how much they’d continued to drink after their dates had departed the pub. Hours later, his friend’s gasping laughter jarred Steve as he fumbled with the keys, and he felt his temper boil just that much hotter. What was he even laughing at _now_? They were huddled in the empty corridor outside their apartment and hadn’t spoken a word to one another for 10 blocks.

Bucky’s date had seemed nice enough. Eager to be manhandled around the dance floor and bask in the attention of her handsome, suave, _delightful_ fella (Bucky’s words, _not_ Steve’s). Her (much less amenable) cousin, too, had gravitated toward Bucky whenever he’d paused at their booth, earnestly attempting to catch his eye, hungrily vying for his attentions every chance she was given. When hurricane Bucky had blown past, her cagey gaze would slide back to Steve, not even pretending to mask her distaste before settling back into charming pessimism. Whenever he could, Steve would slink off to grab another round of drinks from the bar just to escape the waves of condescension smothering the booth.

Every now and then, he’d catch sight of Bucky and his girl on the dance floor, whirling and twirling to the whims of the bandstand- his large hand clasped greedily in her dainty one, her lithe body swinging saucily in rhythmic tandem with his wider hips. Her festive A-line dress fluttering around the pressed slacks that flattered Bucky’s muscled thighs and rear- in ways Steve refused to think overmuch about _thanks a lot, whiskey_ \- thanks to a few tight months with little cash to invest in a better fit and long days working hard labor at the shipyards. And that night work Steve also refused to think about unless expressly confronted with it.

Confronted like tonight, since Bucky was wearing that damn red tie. _Flaunting_ that damn tie, like he didn’t give one whiff of thought to the sea of men and women around him oblivious to its meaning.

Fuck Bucky. Fuck Bucky and the fifty some pounds he had on Steve. Fuck Bucky and that carefree fucking laugh. Fucky Bucky and his implacable charm. And the insufferable ease with which he’d chat up dames. And the way he could swing them around the dance hall like it was nothing. And the way he could have _any_ of them even though that bastard didn’t even _want_ a single one of them.

That asshole’s looks, and charm, and smile were wasted on the world. And he didn’t even care that schmucks like Steve would have killed for an ounce of the allure he wielded so carelessly.

“ _Steve_? You gonna get the door or what?”

Steve grit his teeth and shoved the key home, flinging the door open with much more force than was really necessary, and if the confounded look Bucky tossed him was any indication, the asshole noticed.

“Got a problem, Steve? Thought we were having fun, what’s crawled up your shorts and died?”

Bucky was his problem.

“Just tired.”

Tired of third wheeling his way through Bucky’s life. Tired of putting on a brave face every time a girl sized him up and found him wanting _again_. Tired of ignoring the rouge tinting Bucky’s shirt collars knowing full well where it came from, after Bucky stumbled home from his second job in the Village. Tired of ignoring the way certain men in Brooklyn let their slimy gazes run Bucky up and down like they had his damn number. Tired of acting like none of it _bothered_ Steve.

Tired of being the jack ass that wished, even just for one wicked, graceless minute, that Bucky was a different person. That Bucky would drop the damn act and leave some dames for the rest of the poor bastards like Steve in the world.

But Steve knew why Bucky did it- of course he knew. Just like Steve also knew it was just that one small, mean piece of his heart that felt that way. Bucky was his brother in all but blood. He knew his friend inside and out, had known about the dark corners of _Bucky’s_ heart since they had begun to stumble into adolescence. He’d known and _accepted_ all those parts of Bucky, and loved him anyway, and Bucky knew that. Steve loved that Bucky trusted him with those parts of himself, and still tried to shelter Steve from them all the same. Because Steve just didn’t know what would happen if Bucky didn’t. He never let himself consider it, after the first time.

He’d gone to visit Bucky at his second job once, with his permission.

Bucky’d seemed reluctant to give it, when Steve had asked, but Steve, like the stubborn ass he was, had insisted. The side eye Bucky had given him had spoken volumes- a warning Steve had promptly ignored, like in many other aspects of his life- though he’d caved and scrawled the address on the back of one of Steve’s doodles all the same.

“Don’t dress up, if you know what’s good for ya,” Was all he’d said on his way out the door for the shipyards.

Hindsight being 20/20, Steve knew now what Bucky had been doing his damndest to shelter Steve from, and he’d gone on to give Bucky’s other life a wide berth since that night.

For more reasons than Bucky likely suspected, but again, Steve _wasn’t thinking about that_ , _no no no_.

“I’m guessing you didn’t have a good time then,” Bucky drawled forlornly, tugging off that infernal tie and tossing over the back of their raggedy couch.

With a sigh, Steve began divesting himself. He didn’t mean to bring Bucky’s mood down as well. He knew Bucky orchestrated these nights for Steve’s benefit, getting very little out of it for himself aside from the pleasures of music, dance, and spirits.

“It wasn’t that bad, alright? I just…” He didn’t know how to voice his feelings without sounding like a royal ass about the whole thing, but Bucky deserved that much for at least making the effort he did, “I don’t know how many more dates I can scare off before I decide to give up entirely.” And it was Bucky’s turn to sigh.

“Steve, its-”

“No, Buck. I know- I know what you’re gonna say, but you don’t get it. Girls- dames _like_ you. It's like you're a street lamp and they’re moths to it. I’m never gonna be that guy.”

Bucky glanced back at him earnestly, “Steve, you know I-”

“I _know_ , Bucky. It’s just- I know you can’t help it but, sometime you’re just too,” Steve gave another frustrated sigh, “I don’t know how to explain it.”

“Can you try? I’m just trying to help ya out here,” Bucky answered with a frown as he shucked his button up, leaving only his undershirt.

“I don’t think,” Steve began, trying his best to not sound like the ungrateful  jack ass he knew he was, “I just don’t think this is something you can help with. Kinda the opposite, really.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“Listen, I’m really explaining this _real_ poorly.”

“You’re not explaining this _at all_.”

Steve growled, irritated with Bucky’s persistence and his own ineloquence, “I’m just saying- no dame is ever gonna look twice at me while you’re around, alright? And it’s just salt in the damn wound that any dame would murder her sister to be on your arm and you- you’re just.” He couldn’t cross that line. He couldn’t.

Bucky’s answering smirk was sharp and bitter, “Too queer?”

“Fuck, Bucky, you know I don’t mean it like-”  
  
“Except you kinda do.”

“No, really,” Steve paused, knowing Bucky would see through any excuses he attempted, “Okay, yeah. Maybe.”

Bucky sighed feelingly but didn’t respond. He just puttered around, in those ill-fitting slacks and undershirt, pretending not to care that his best friend was the biggest asshole this side of the East River.

But as his best friend, Steve knew he had to at least try and salvage this.

“Listen, I know you’ve slept with a dame before,” He tried to start over.

“More than one,” Bucky shot back snidely.

“You’re not helping, here,” Bucky just shrugged and flung himself gracelessly onto the sofa, seemingly content to let Steve bumble his way through this, “But that’s m’ point, Buck. I’ve never even kissed a girl for real, while even you’ve _suffered_ through making time with ‘em. Being out with you on these dates… I don’t think it’s ever gonna turn out like you want it to, okay? I don’t mean to make this sound like it’s all on you- we both know it’s not. There aren’t many girls out there who’d settle for the likes of me at the end of the day. But it’s especially unlikely with you there by comparison.”

Finally, Bucky let the insufferable act drop and leaned forward, bracing his elbows on his knees and swiping tired hands over his face.

“I get it. I _do_ , Steve,” Steve arched an expressive eyebrow, and Bucky laughed, “No, really. You don’t think you wouldn’t make a better fairy than me?” Bucky held up his hand, fending off the reaction he knew would come at that, the bastard, “I know, I _know_. But really, I’m not exactly the poster child for the life, you know? Fairies are s’pposed to be pretty, and _femme_ , and shit that I ain’t and I don’t _want_ to be.”

“Buck, modesty don’t suit you. So what if you ain’t Mae West in a suit. Don’t even try to tell me you’re not beating the fairies off with a stick.”

Bucky shifted uncomfortably, “I don’t really go with the fairies all that often, to be real honest. Or ever,” He cast Steve a shadow of his cocky grin though, “Not that I don’t get offers.”

Steve rolled his eyes, “Well that’s a shock.”

“But really though, me n’ the fairies… we aren’t compatible.”

“What does that even mean?”

“I don’t think I should be explaining this kind of thing to you, Steve,” Bucky groaned, sitting back to cover his face with his hands.

“Why not?” Steve pouted. As much as he appreciated Bucky’s subtle efforts to keep his private life behind closed doors, something in Steve would always rail against the idea that he was being coddled.

“I mean it, Stevie. I know how much you hate being told no, but seriously. _No_.”

Steve huffed grumpily, but let it drop, rather magnanimously, he thought. They both continued to get ready for bed in silence.

\--

Not even two nights later, they were stumbling home once again.

This time around, Steve was in much better spirits- blood singing with booze and high off the dance he’d managed to stagger through with a bitty blonde lady at the hall. She’d gracefully bowed out after one turn, doing her best to hide her limp after a few too many of Steve’s left feet found her delicate toes, but it was progress nonetheless, right? The memory was already foggy through his inebriated haze, and he’d likely be embarrassed by his thoroughly lackluster performance tomorrow, but tonight it left a warm, hopeful feeling in his gut.

It had helped that Bucky hadn’t joined him until later in the evening, having been working an evening over in the Village that night. A less intoxicated Steve would have been surprised he’d made it at all, since it wasn’t uncommon for Bucky to be out until the wee hours of the morning on nights he worked. As it was, drunk Steve had been thrilled when Bucky’s stalked into the pub later, eager to regale his friend with the evening’s successes.

“Little Rogers is grow’n up so fast,” Bucky had simpered, wiping a nonexistent tear from his eye and pinching Steve’s cheek obnoxiously, “Next thing I know, you’ll be ducking out to do a girl back behind the trash piles and I’ll know you don’t need me hangin’ around no more.”

They’d stayed out later than they would normally, riding Steve’s high- though he’d managed to register that Bucky had been in relatively good cheer as well, loose limbed and radiating a comfortable pleasure that complemented Steve’s manic pleasure easily. They’d only almost gotten into two brawls the whole time, to top it all off.

Bucky’s cajoling returned in a delirious echo in later on, as they stumbled home, brain in a drunken jumble.

“I don’t need you for anything in the first place, jerk,” Steve grumbled, as he fumbled with their lock, this time through no fault but his own.

“So I hear,” Bucky replied easily, either similarly jumbled enough to follow Steve’s random tangents, or agreeably drunk enough to not to care.

“And anyway, I think I’ll settle for a second dance before I start investing in rubbers,” Steve shot back with a grin, conquering their door and immediately making to hang up his coat jacket, concentrating extra hard to make in onto their coat hooks, “Pretty sure I broke a few’ve her toes. She was nice enough about it.”

Bucky had already shed his own coat and tie (at least it wasn’t the damn red one tonight), tossing both haphazardly over the couch, then turning back to Steve, grabbing him quickly by the hand and tugging him into a spin swift enough that he almost ralphed right there, the evening’s alcohol sloshing dangerously in his belly.

“Nothing a little practice won’t fix, Stevie.”

“Hey,” Steve gasped, shoving a placating hand into Bucky’s shoulder, attempting to calm his roiling stomach, “You’re gonna make me hurl if you keep that up, jerk.”

“Punk,” Bucky shot back, but steered them out of the tight whirl he’d started, “It wouldn’t be me doin’ the spinning anyway. You gotta learn how to lead properly if you’re gonna get a girl in the back alley.”

“I know how to lead, Buck.”

“Oh yeah?” Bucky asked, shifting the hand in Steve’s and sliding his arm over to rest just on top of his bony shoulder, which Steve only had the presence of mind to be briefly self-conscious about before Bucky was subtly shifting their weight into an easy turn that Steve could recognize as a casual waltz, “Show me what we’re working with then.”

Steve slipped his own arm under Bucky’s resting his hand easily on the firm planes of muscle under Bucky’s shoulder blade, too drunk and happy to feel the hint of anxiety that would be choking sober Steve in a similar position. On the contrary, drunk Steve immediately launched the two of them into an ambitious turn and sway, picking up a quick tempo against the nonexistent music.

“Whoa, slow down, big guy,” Bucky laughed, gently easing their pace to something more sedate, “I don’t want to have to clean your booze off my shoes tomor- _ow_ , _fuck_.”

“Shit. Sorry, Buck,” Steve laughed, and Bucky huffed at his obvious insincerity.

“I’m a classy fuckin’ dame, remember, Steve? You’d better act a little more apologetic, or you won’t be getting any sugar tonight, let alone anywhere near that alley.”

“Nah, I know this one’s a sure thing. She can handle a few bruises.”

“Rude, Steven,” Though Bucky was laughing, too, “You calling me easy?”

“If the size 11 spanish heel fits- _ow_ , fuck you, asshole,” Steve broke off, pausing their waltz to rub his bruised leg.

Bucky glanced faux-haughtily down his nose, like he hadn’t just fuckin’ kicked his friend in the shin like a five year old, “You better watch yourself, Stevie. See if I let you take me out again, you keep insisting I’m a rough girl.”

“You’re a rough something, that’s for sure,” Steve grumbled, though it was Bucky who picked up Steve’s hand again, somehow managing to lead from the dame’s side- though it shouldn’t have been surprising considering it was Bucky. The pace was a bit quicker this time around, and Steve struggled to match Bucky’s movements- the room was starting to tilt and spin on its own. Jesus, how drunk were they?

“Shut the fuck up, Steve,” Bucky said, and Steve had to mentally wrangle his thoughts back to remember what Bucky could be responding to. It was difficult.

They waltzed sedately through the meager open floor of their living space, encompassing their sitting area, bedroom, and kitchenette. Steve’s hand drifted without his conscious knowledge, sliding down to rest against Bucky’s ribs, and it was only then Steve realized that they’d never flipped the lights and were only navigating by the warm glow of the streetlamps through the dirty window.

“Surprised we haven’t tripped over the rug,” He wondered aloud. His astigmatism typically made wandering in the dark a treacherous endeavor.

Bucky hummed in response, “Yeah, but you’re doing fine. Try a spin.”

In reality, the spin (and their lack of tripping) were mostly accomplished thanks to Bucky’s careful though drunken guidance, but Steve let the success of the move add fuel to the burgeoning flame of his confidence, and he attempted to up the speed once more.

Bucky laughed and resisted, tugging Steve marginally closer in the process, “You ain’t ready for the next step up, pal.”

Steve would have responded with the proper indignation due to such a comment, if he hadn’t found himself distracted by the gentle warmth of Bucky’s body as the distance between them decreased.

It was a warm late spring evening, to the point that they’d both sweated through their evening coats hours ago, though now the cooling sweat and divestment of clothes left the chill that perpetually dogged Steve a chance to set in. The revelation of Bucky’s body heat had Steve inching closer without a second thought.

He felt Bucky’s chin graze the hair near his temple as his friend glanced down.

“Getting comfortable?” Steve hummed without properly responding, sliding the hand on Bucky’s back around until his fingers were brushing the taller man’s spine. He’d only meant to get more of his skinny arm closer to Bucky’s heat, but even through the mild haze of alcohol, he registered Bucky’s shiver.

“Don’t tell me you’re cold, you jerk. You’re like a fuckin’ furnace.”

Their pace stuttered briefly, and Steve was oddly giddy as he realized it was due to Bucky, not himself. He magnanimously chose not to say anything, but definitely made a mental note of Bucky’s clumsiness to gloat over later. Bucky didn’t respond to the jibe, nor made a sound at all, actually. There were were no outward indications or clues, but the pause that followed actually felt… awkward and tense, somehow.

Steve glanced up, and couldn’t hold back his crow of triumph this time around.

“You’re blushing, Buck!”

“Fuck you, Steve.”

“Hey, if I can get the notorious _Bucky Barnes_ flustered, I think that qualifies me for at least some necking. You just wait until next time we make it Lucky Joe’s, Buck, I’ll have the dames eatin’ outta my hand.”

“Someone’s confident all of a sudden,” Bucky murmured, “You probably won’t be talkin’ so big tomorrow, Steve. Don’t forget, I know for a fact that at the ripe ol’ age of 20, you ain’t never made it to first base with a dame before. Best not put the cart before the horse.”

Steve glowered and retaliated against the crack by flinging Bucky into another spin, a bit faster than their measured tempo allowed for. Annoyingly enough, Bucky followed his lead with ease, curling back into Steve’s arms without a misstep. Even drunk though he was, he couldn’t argue that Bucky didn’t have a point.

“I’m gonna muck that up, too, aren’t I,” Steve muttered forlornly, “It’s not like can practice necking like I can the waltz.”

“Only waltzing by the loosest definition,” Bucky admitted, shifting his weight with enough practiced grace not to disrupt Steve’s rhythm. The motion had gentle knobs of his spine rolling briefly against Steve’s hand, and suddenly, Steve was more aware of Bucky’s body than just as a source of heat.

Each shift had the solid muscles of Bucky’s back pressing back against his hand as Bucky adjusted his center of gravity. Each step dragged their slightly sweaty hands against each other as they maintained their balance against one another. Each turn had Steve’s hip brushing the top of Bucky’s thigh and now Steve was thinking about those damn slacks that Bucky still hadn’t-

Good lord, he was drunk.

And Bucky was still talking.

“Probably break a hip or something f’were to make a go of the Lindy,” Bucky was saying, “It’s not really a Lindy if you ain’t swinging like apes and tossing her ‘round ‘n stuff. I know you like to think you can do that kinda stuff, but let’s face it, you’ll probably have to draw the line at manhandling a dame like she ain’t twice your size,” and maybe it was Steve’s admittedly unreliable hearing failing him again, but no. He could swear Bucky was babbling.

Babbling was what nervous people (like Steve Rogers) did- The Bucky Barnes’ of the world didn’t babble. He had no context for this. Processing that concurrently with maintaining their dance steps proved to be too much, and Bucky grunted as Steve drew them to a sudden and dramatic halt, causing his elbow to dig into Bucky’s ribs.

“Fuck, there’re easier ways to shut someone up, Steve,” Bucky grumbled, rubbing his side with a look of irritation, lips curled in a grimace, “Dames can’t handle a bit of rough treatment the way I can.”

And just like that, the emotional roller coaster of the last ten minutes caught up to Steve, and his mood plummeted faster than a drop on the Cyclone.

“God, you’re right, Bucky. Why do I even bother? I wouldn’t know what to do with a girl after the second dance- this is fuckin’ hopeless.”

“Hey, no,” Bucky protested immediately, dropping his hand from his side and stepping back into Steve’s personal space, “You were doin’ great, seriously. It ain’t all about the Lindy- plenty of girls would swoon for a nice waltz turn. I was _this_ close to bein’ swept off my feet.”

Steve snorted and began to pull back, ready to pull the plug on this whole debacle, when Bucky stepped even closer and cut off his retreat by grabbing Steve’s mallets-for-hands and pulling them around his waist to brush against his spine again. He used Steve’s dumbfounded silence to further unsettle his friend by sliding his hands up Steve’s neck, tangling his fingers loosely in the floppy hair Steve had meant to get cut weeks ago.

“We weren’t finished with our dance, Steve,” He said, quietly, just above a whisper into the scant space between them.

Steve let out another ugly snort, tilting his head up to look his friend in the eye, “You don’t gotta do this, Buck.”

Bucky just snorted back, “Like it’s some kinda chore, Steve.”

He just sighed, “Thanks for trying to cheer me up and all, but really, we both know I’m a lost cause here. Let’s just go to bed so I can sleep this booze off and forget what a putz I am,” Steve made to pull back once again, only to be held in place by Bucky’s hands tightening in his hair. He grunted in annoyance, shooting Bucky a look he hoped made it clear how done with this whole charade he is.

“Shut up, I know what I’m doing. You gotta get your practice in from somewhere, right? I’m doin’ all your future girls a favor here, so I expect more than a few thank you cards in my future.”

Steve was about to come back with another snide remark when Bucky unceremoniously hauled him up and forward to cover Steve’s mouth with his own. For the rough handling, the contact was softer than Steve would have expected, given the milliseconds of warning he’d been allowed before finding himself locking lips with his best friend.

Contrary to his insistence earlier, Steve has kissed (and been kissed) a few times in his relatively short life. Once in primary school, when his small stature hadn’t been as prominent as it became after the ravages of puberty, Katharine Hughes had given him a shy smooch on the playground after he’d presented her with a colorful doodle of her likeness for St. Valentine's Day. As a teenager, he’d scored kisses few and far between from a few of the more amenable girls Bucky had finagled into double dates. Most were no more than chaste pecks, more for politeness’ sake than anything else. And finally, the shameful and embarrassingly heated kiss that had been laid on him (quite against his will) by a far removed cousin a few months before his mother’s death, when distant relatives had come to say their fraught goodbyes. He’d never worked up the nerve to tell Bucky about that one.

This kiss was like none of those.

In his stunned and drunken state, Steve’s mind shorted out hazily. He couldn’t tell whether it was Bucky’s (infamous) kissing prowess or whether it was just _Bucky_ , but whatever it was, it had successfully reduced Steve’s brain down to mush. But no matter the cause, Bucky’s lips were plush and pliant against his own (just as soft as they looked, the traitorous thoughts that Steve had shoved into that box in the back of his mind that was _never to be opened thank you very much_ supplied), and in the few seconds their lips remained connected, Steve felt them flex and drag gently against his own. And while his previous kissing experience could also be described as gentle, for the most part, none of them had been weighted with _intensity_ like now. Bucky’s lips were firm, without being pushy, and soft, and warm, and-

What the _hell_ were they doing?

As Steve’s brain caught up to his damn mouth, he tried to muster up the willpower to push Bucky away, only for the other man to beat him to it- only instead of a rough shove, Bucky parted them simply by delicately pulling back a few inches, still cradling Steve’s face between his palms. His grip wasn’t hard enough that Steve couldn’t break it easily if he tried, but just insistent enough to keep him still for the moment.

“And if I’m not the best man at your goddamn wedding, Steven, so help me-”

Bucky’s quiet words snapped Steve out of his messy reverie, “What is- What are we _doing_?”

Bucky scowled (prettily- _shut up, brain_ ), “We’re getting you to first base, Stevie, what did you think?”

How dare that jerk make it sound like _Steve_ was the one slow on the uptake here. His face must have said as much, because Bucky soldiered on.

“Hey, we don’t gotta do anything you don’t want to, okay? Just figured, you gotta get there eventually, and hey, we’re both drunk already, so there’s no pressure to perform or nothing. I ain’t got any expectations or anything- it’s just _me_ , you know, so…” Bucky petered out with a sigh, “This was dumb, ’m sorry, Steve. I’ll just-”

And somehow, someway, now Steve felt like an ass (again). Bucky was just trying to help, and it’s not like Steve had better options for experience banging down his door. Here his friend was offering a way to proactively combat that persistent performance anxiety that seemed to dictate so many facets of his life. And it’s not like Bucky didn’t know what ( _who_ ) he was signing up for here. They knew just about everything there was to know about each other.

Bucky’s fingers in his hair twitched like he was about to let go, so Steve tightened his grip around the other man’s waist.

“No, Buck, it’s not- it’s not a terrible idea, I guess.”

His friend just frowned, “We don’t have to do nothin’, Steve. I won’t feel bad for you sayin’ no. My pride ain’t that fragile.”

“Bucky, shut up, alright? I just- I want to, okay? Let’s do it, just… don’t let me think about it too much,” Steve gulped, bracing himself for what he was asking for, “Just show me how to do it.”

Bucky gave him a shaky smile, “You can tap out at anything, Steve. It’s all up to you. Just close your eyes and pretend real hard that I’m some doll with pretty tits and I’ll walk you through it,” He laughed, tinged audibly with uneasiness, “Might take some pretty persistent pretending, but this ain’t the Village so I ain’t got any better options for you.”

“It’s fine,” Steve insisted, feeling much more sober for the moment, doing as instructed and closing his eyes.

“Okay, I’m going to kiss you again, okay?” _Fuck_ , Bucky was nervous about this, too. What the hell was _Steve_ supposed to do? “And then I’ll move your hands and you just gotta do what you’d do to a girl where I put them, okay? It’ll be pretty obvious. First and second base stuff. Don’t worry about making me uncomfortable or nothin’ like that- I’ve had a lot worse hands on me-”

“ _Bucky_ ,” Steve growled, “Get the fuck on with it, will you,” Okay, maybe he was still a little drunk. Sober Steve would never have been so pushy with… with _that_ on the line.

Bucky huffed, tightening his grip on Steve’s hair, “You asked for it, punk. Here’s coming up on first.”

And with that Bucky dove back in, brushing his lips insistently over Steve’s, harder than they’d been earlier. ‘Cept this time, after a few moments of soft pressing and sliding, Steve felt Bucky’s lips part against his and _okay_ , Buck was really diving right into it then. Don’t pass GO, don’t collect two hundred dollars.

The slide of lips over lips dampened as Steve opened his own lips in response to Bucky’s move, and for a few moments Bucky seemed content to leave it at that- the mellow graze of lips and mixing of breath. Feather-light thumbs ghosted over Steve’s cheekbones, and it was that touch that spurred Steve to take a chance and make a move for first base. He let his tongue creep between his lips to press lightly against Bucky’s full bottom lip.

He heard Bucky’s pleased hum and felt his smile before he pulled back just enough to murmur, “There ya go,” before Bucky returned Steve’s exploratory caress with one of his own- Bucky’s much bolder tongue slid out to swipe at the seam of Steve’s lips. Their tongues met briefly in the middle (and wasn’t _that_ an interesting sensation) before Bucky’s ducked coyly back between his own lips. A few more teasing touches later, Steve got the picture and chased Bucky’s tongue with his own and _holy fuck his tongue was in Bucky’s mouth how did this happen_.

Overwhelmed with the sensation of his tongue inexpertly tracing the hot planes of Bucky’s mouth (hard for his teeth, softer for his gums, and softest over his tongue and lips), Steve felt his hand spasm against Bucky’s waist (where he was now gripping Bucky’s muscular sides _when did that happen_ ), and Bucky hummed in encouragement once again. What was it he’d said? Touch like he would on a dame.

With that thought, he let his glide up to grip once more at the firm planes of Bucky’s back just south of his shoulder blades, digging his fingers into the flesh, much more insistently than when they’d been dancing not too long ago (it felt like _hours_ ). He could feel the shift and pull of Bucky’s back muscles even more acutely, and Steve wouldn’t lie, Bucky’s body beneath his fingertips felt intoxicating.

They’d been trading tongues and saliva (weird weird weird but good good so good) for a few minutes when Bucky hands finally relinquished Steve’s hair to reach down and grasp at Steve’s wrists. And he could feel it on his over sensitized lips when Bucky drew in a gentle breath.

“That was first, Stevie- how’s second base looking?”

He hadn’t drawn far enough back to fully separate their lips, and the words were spoken directly into Steve’s mouth, a further teasing slide of plush, swollen lips. Bucky was lucky Steve’d heard the words at all. He flexed his forearms against Bucky’s grip, trying to curl his fingers back to scrape at Bucky’s spine once more, but Bucky resisted, and it took Steve a moment to realize he was waiting on an answer.

“Yes, yes, second’s good, keep _going-_ ” What even was second base? Steve had never fully grasped the baseball metaphors for sex that other boys their age threw around. First he knew was kissing like the girls in the 8 pagers. Second was… what again?

Bucky answered the unspoken question by dragging Steve’s hands where he wanted them, which was apparently- _oh good god_.

“Now this is the part where you’re really gonna have to pretend, alright?” Bucky breathed, but Steve barely registered the words.

Because Bucky had led him to two handfuls of muscular (was there even a part of Bucky that wasn’t defined by this one word?) pectorals, firmed and toned from years of hard labor and boxing practice. And Steve couldn’t figure out for the life of him what to do with his hands where they’d found themselves.

He tried (valiantly) to suppress a startled squeak when Bucky’s teeth grazed his bottom lip lightly before nipping it hard enough to sting a little bit. The dignified reflex had the added effect of startling a full body twitch out of Steve- including his hands still being held in place against Bucky’s chest. What they were left with was a (twitchy) two handed, rather violent grope that seemed to startle even Bucky, who laughed breathlessly.

“Oh _yeah_ ,” He giggled in a breathy falsetto that immediately set Steve’s teeth on edge, “Just like that Steven- so _good_ ,” Causing Steve to snap his eyes open and glare at his best friend as fiercely as he was able in his current state.

Steve didn’t wait even a moment to slap Bucky on the arm and growl, “ _Knock it off_.”

Bucky snickered, obviously plenty amused with himself, before trailing off in a genuine gasp when Steve returned his hands to Bucky’s chest, pressing in more insistently until he could feel the hard nubs of Bucky’s nipples through the thin fabric of his undershirt, grazing his palms and causing the hair on the back of Steve’s shoulders and neck to rise.

It seemed Steve wasn’t the only affected by the action, as Bucky’s grip suddenly withdrew, and two strong arms wrapped themselves loosely around Steve’s slighter shoulders.

“Now you're gettin’ it, Steve,” Bucky’s breathing had noticeably deepened, and he could intimately feel the rise and fall of Bucky’s chest and shoulders now, the way they were pressed up close, with his hands… his hands…

Counting on the idea that Bucky would say something his he made any move out of line, Steve drug his hand slowly down his handfuls, letting nails scrape lightly against the fabric. One nail caught briefly on one of those nipples and he heard and felt Bucky draw in a sharp breath through his nose. Steve was about to draw back, but Bucky beat him to it once again.

“ _It’s fine,_ ” He preempted hurriedly, “That was fine, Steve. Just a bit sensitive. Dames _love_ that shit.”

Taking his friend at his word, Steve’s hand continued down their path until he was able to cup the firm mounds of Bucky’s pectorals in his hands, and gently pushed them up, the way he’d seen men do to women’s breasts in the blue comics. Curling his fingers, he let his nails deliberately scrape those nipples again, hoping to elicit a similar reaction.

He wasn’t disappointed, as Bucky began to _squirm_ under his hands.

“F-fuck, Steve.”

It was Bucky’s muttered expletive that made Steve realize they’d stopped kissing who the fuck knew when and had just been panting into each other’s mouths like dogs in heat for who knows how long. _Heat_. God, this heat was unbearable, creeping up his spine along every one of his nerves, senses heightened and aware in a way they never were in his everyday life, tuned to every twitch, gasp, and breath of Bucky’s, each reaction he elicited hot wired directly to Steve’s-

Oh no. _Nonono_.

But _yes_. Yesyesyes. Steve was fast approaching fully erect within his dress slacks, suddenly hyper aware of the slick, molten heat pooling at the apex of his thighs, the fire stoked by everything _Bucky_ in this moment. Steve was drunk on more than just whiskey as he felt Bucky up. God, _Bucky_ …

Somewhere deep in the recesses of drunk Steve’s lizard brain, sober Steve could pinpoint this as the ethereal _what if_ he’d been staving off for months- _years_? The very contingency he’d never let himself consider since the first time he’d witnessed for himself Bucky in his element at the queer saloon, dolled up with kohl and rouge and powder, kitted with women’s clothes and heels that defined the muscles of his calves in new and terrifying ways. The other half of Bucky, who’d chatted up men as easily as dames, touching their shoulders, and laughing at their awful jokes. Refusing to recognize the stark nuances of this other-Bucky’s walk, the undeniable _swish_ of his hips as he sauntered through the bar like a sleek, dangerous predator. Volatile in a way Steve had never borne witness to before, even when pummeling opponents in the boxing ring. Steve knew immediately why the resort paid Bucky to just show up- he had _men_ (boys, fairies, queers, _normals_ ) eating out of the palm of his hand.

Yeah, Steve had seen it all, taken it in and immediately shut it away just as urgently, instinctively knowing that this was a thread he should not ( _could not_ ) pull, lest everything he knew about himself unravel, and possibly their friendship along with it.

But God, here he was now, coming apart at the seams, and helpless to do anything but drown in the sensation of Bucky’s nails scraping desperately against his shoulders as Steve continued to knead his chest with vigor. He felt his friend practically vibrating under his hands, hissing weakly with every brush of Steve’s nails.

Continuing to scratch lightly with one hand, Steve let the other give into the urge to thoroughly grope the swell of chest beneath it, and nearly jumped out of his skin when Bucky unleashed a wild, broken moan, seemingly unconsciously pressing forward into Steve’s covetous hands.

“God, Steve, what’re you doing to-” Steve cut the taller man off by franticly sealing his mouth over Bucky’s once again, though his friend didn’t seem to mind in the slightest. He pressed insistently up on his toes to ravage Bucky’s pliant mouth, now that Bucky wasn’t consciously ducking down to meet Steve halfway.

And Bucky let himself be ravaged. While Steve had expected a certain level of passivity from Bucky, as he let Steve get a handle on the ropes, he had not foreseen the level of _hunger_ he could feel pouring off Bucky as Steve took what he wanted. The taller man offered no opposition or complaint, only the bruising grip of his hands flexing against Steve’s shoulder pulling him closer offered Steve any further feedback.

With bleary eyes, Steve pulled back to get a quick glimpse of Bucky’s reaction. Or, what was supposed to be a quick glimpse, at least. Though when met with Bucky’s similarly glazed stare and the unwholesome pink wound that was his friend’s kiss-bitten and swollen mouth, Steve suddenly didn’t know how to tear his eyes away.

He’d done that. He’d taken Bucky apart and put him back together desperate, needy, and hungry for it. Steve had measured himself numerous times in his life only to find himself wanting. Wanting for work, wanting for respect, wanting for strength, wanting for _air_. But good Lord above, skinny, asthmatic, broken Steve Rogers had taken Bucky here, and God above, that was a powerful feeling.

“Steve, _Steven_ ,” Bucky murmured lowly, drawing Steve out of his rambling musings, “If you don’t kiss me ‘gain right this fuckin’ second, swear t’ God, I won’t be responsible for m’ actions.”

A helpless laugh escaped Steve. Well, okay, maybe Bucky wasn’t quite as broken down and wrung out as Steve would’ve liked to imagine, but heavens, if brassy, mouthy Bucky didn’t do it for him as easily as moaning, desperate Bucky- it was _Bucky_. This was _James Buchanan Barnes_ Steve refused to take his hands off.

And Steve was helpless to do anything but give him what he asked for.

They continued to devour each other until Steve’s foggy brain lost all timekeeping ability completely. All he remained aware of was the wet, messy slide of Bucky’s mouth against his as the man continued to gently reveal the glorious nuances of first base, while Steve continued to enjoy the pleasures of second, letting his hands and fingers unabashedly explore the endless curves and dips of Bucky’s body. Those hands eventually found their way around to Bucky’s spine once more, meandering down the knobs of the column reverently. This time, Bucky didn’t hold back the desire he’d suppressed before, arching back into the stoke of Steve’s hands.

With a rush of hot air, Steve was shoved back, Bucky’s arms unwinding from his shoulders frantically. He was about stew himself into a good panic when he was caught by Bucky’s steely grey-blue gaze meeting his own, as the other man drew back to pull his undershirt over his head and shoulders in one smooth motion, revealing the shifting, rippling undulations of all those toned muscles beneath the supple skin of his torso. The torso Steve’d just had his hands all over, which Bucky was now bearing to him anew.

“You can close your eyes again if you want, Steve,” Bucky said softly, returning to within arm’s reach, “But second isn’t quite cleared until you get a girl out of her underthings,” He smirked dangerously, “Most of the time.”

“You’re awfully smart about dames for someone who likes cock as much as you do, Bucky,” Steve shot back, schooling his features into his best unimpressed look, despite being almost unbearably riled up.

Bucky’s haughty facade vanished as he barked out a helpless laugh in the face of Steve’s salt, reaching out to gently pull Steve back within the circle of his arms, as Steve reached out to brush his fingers against all that pale, Irish skin for the first time.

Bucky’d spent many of their teen years bitching about his inability to tan- sun overexposure gifting him with nothing but angry red burns that later faded to dustings of freckles before vanishing entirely as summer rolled into fall. Not prone to freckles himself, the soft blemishes against Bucky’s light skin had fascinated Steve when they were younger. He’d captured the constellations of pigment that decorated Bucky’s skin countless times in his sketchbooks, to Bucky’s grudging chagrin. He’d followed the sun’s tiny footprints across Bucky’s cheekbones, over his shoulders, down his strong arms, and under the fabric of his undershirts, guided by an honest to God figure study assignment from one of his numerous art classes, wherein Steve’s genuinely most convenient study was his exhausted best friend, shirtless and napping after a long shift at the drydocks. He’d mapped the trail down Bucky’s spine to where it spread across his hip bones, and wondered with idle curiosity how far down Bucky’s freckles traveled, as the dusting disappeared beneath the low waistband of Bucky’s Dickies.

With spring only beginning, Bucky’s skin remained unmarred as of yet by the sun’s influence, but that didn’t stop Steve from studiously considering the dimples of flesh over Bucky’s hipbones that the expanse of skin conjured within his mind’s eye. The prospect was an inspiring one.

Newly galvanized, Steve drew his eyes closed once again, wanting to appreciate the texture of Bucky with as much focus as his alcohol and lust fogged brain could muster. And Jesus, it was like looking through the corrective lenses at the eye doctor- everything that had been blurry and uncertain before was now crisp and defined. Through the thin fabric of Bucky’s shirt, Steve hadn’t even known he’d been wanting for the high resolution of Bucky’s uncovered skin until his fingers met the ridges of Bucky’s collarbones, the chiseled borders of Bucky’s chest, the peaks and valleys of Bucky’s abdomen.

“Not exactly like what you’d find on a dame,” Bucky commentated gently, “They’re a lot… softer. Everywhere.”

Steve hummed like he gave a flying fuck what a woman felt like at this very moment. As appealing as he generally found the idea of women- which was certainly a lot more appealing than _Bucky_ found the idea of them- right now, his interest was focused solely on the man in front of him and _boy_ , wasn’t that thought going to take some analyzing later. _Much_ later. Never might be a good time.

His fingers brushed over the buds of Bucky’s nipples, unimpeded by fabric, and the high-pitched whine that startled from Bucky had Steve prepared to go back for seconds, until he found his wrists redirected quite suddenly. He opened his eyes briefly, only to be met by Bucky giving him an insistent shake of the head, communicating clearly to Steve that that area was now off limits. Though _why_ , Steve couldn’t begin to fathom, but allowed Bucky to set his limits despite not understanding them.

“I can’t- not that anymore, okay Steve? ‘S too much,” Bucky panted, “Sorry.”

Steve nodded, accepting Bucky’s line in the sand willingly enough, returning questing fingers to the taut skin over Bucky’s ribs, curving around to the ridge of his spine. The knobs and dips of it undulated with Bucky’s shifting as he responded to Steve’s touch. And God, was he responding. Steve would later be unable to recall whether Bucky was putting on a show or genuinely writhing for more, but for his part, _Steve_ was genuinely (and drunkenly) uninhibited about the ways he wanted to touch and keep touching his friend, about the ways Bucky was lighting him on fire from the inside and good Lord Bucky hadn’t even touched _him_ yet. Just continued to cling to Steve throughout the ordeal like a limpet and let Steve explore. And the more Steve’s exploration yielded, the more he wanted. God, he _wanted_ , like he’d never known possible, and they’d barely done more than kiss.

High on the rush of desire, Steve let his hands press insistently into Bucky’s skin, relishing the firm give and the thin sheen of sweat he could feel gathering there. His palms traveled, almost with a mind of their own, down the curve of Bucky’s back, digits twitching when they found those fucking dimples just above Bucky’s-

Steve almost whined when Bucky pulled back abruptly, not far, but far enough to huff into Steve’s face.

“Trying to steal third, Stevie?” Bucky laughed breathlessly, “You won’t hear me complaining-” Steve’s nails scratched lightly at Bucky’s skin, and he was almost startled to feel the planes of skin interrupted by the rough texture of Bucky’s slacks, not realizing his touch had travelled so far down.

He thought Bucky may have continued speaking, but paid no mind as he withdrew his fingers only momentarily in order to dip them underneath that fabric.

Only to pull them back instantly when Bucky groaned, loud and painful, the sound vibrating through both their chests with their proximity. He glanced up, trying to get a better read on Bucky’s reaction. And oh, _oh_. Bucky’s head was thrown back, too far back to kiss on him again, exposing the corded, pale column of his throat and the harsh line of his square jaw. Plush lips were parted just enough for his desperate- and there was no other word for it- panting to slip through. His eyes were screwed shut tight, but the whole picture was enough to dispel any of Steve’s fears that Bucky wasn’t enjoying any and all of this. Bucky wanted hands on him- he wanted _Steve’s_ hands on him.

“ _Christ_ , Steve, keep going-” Steve didn’t need to be told twice, suddenly and obsessively fixated on his new goal- getting his hands on _everything_ underneath those slacks. On touching Bucky the way he was asking- begging- to be touched. But Jesus, Mary, Joseph, he was not prepared for this. Bucky must have noticed his slight hesitation, because Steve could feel tension creep back into the muscle in his grip. That wouldn’t fucking do.

“If you say one word,” Steve ground out, fingering the lip of Bucky’s trousers, “About pretending you’re a dame right now, God help me, Bucky.”

Bucky released a startled breath that could have been a laugh and righted himself once more, casting Steve a fond look through his lashes, “Roger that, Rogers,” He answered, voice just a breathy whisper of its normal timber, and oh, how Steve needed to kiss him again, “I’m just saying though- this part wouldn’t take much imagination.”

As if to make his point, Bucky’s arms withdrew from the vice grip around Steve’s shoulders and went down, down to the front fastening of those slacks and suddenly Steve’s wandering hands had that much more room to move toward their goal.

And reach for that goal they did.

It was Steve’s turn to groan obscenely as his fingers snuck underneath his friend’s drawers to skim those twin swells of flesh- and where the rest of Bucky was firm and toned, this part of him was soft, supple, and yielding to Steve’s grip. A grip which became embarrassingly insistent at the sound of Bucky’s harsh breathing, and the way his chest brushed against Steve’s as he fought for air. Reading Bucky’s eagerness, Steve didn’t waste another second before taking handfuls of Bucky’s lush behind and kneading them greedily.

“Fuck, _fuck_ ,” Bucky growled, which only egged Steve on more.

“This how ya like it, Buck?” Steve heard himself answer, “When they paw at ya like they’re animals you’re a piece of meat?” He followed up his words by sliding his hands further down, where he could just feel Bucky’s ass meet thighs, and tugging up, feeling the weight of it in his hands- for once in his life thankful at how large and unproportioned they were to the rest of him. Good Lord, Bucky hadn’t been lying. His rear could have been a dame’s for how sensuous and bountiful it felt in his hands. He slid his thumbs roughly over smooth, unblemished skin for good measure, feeling the luscious give of that muscle.

He felt Bucky’s hands reach out again, this time sliding under Steve’s arms and grasping him by the flanks of his undershirt and pulling them flush, using their closeness to nose against Steve’s temple.

“God, yes, _yes_ , Steve,” He breathed right in his ear, and fuck, Steve almost came right there.

He could feel the thick, solid weight of Bucky’s hardened cock against his hip, inches above where Steve was a throbbing mess in his own undershorts and yet somehow, that was more of an accelerant than a deterrent to Steve’s overwhelmed desire. He groaned again, the sound deeper and more primal than he knew himself capable of. He let that desire steer him, fondling Bucky’s ass without shame- massaging, tugging, and molding as he fancied. He felt those trousers slip farther down to Bucky’s thighs as Steve’s ministrations made room for themselves. Bucky was thrusting against Steve’s hip now, seemingly lost in Steve’s strong grip, losing his composure in a way Steve doubted Bucky had planned on when he proposed this lesson. It wasn’t until Steve dug his fingers into the crease between the globes of that ass and pulled them shamelessly apart that Bucky choked on air before releasing a frantic moan into the darkness of their apartment, and Steve knew for sure that this had gone much farther than either of them had anticipated. Bucky’s thrusting ceased and he pressed his ass back into Steve’s hands wantonly.

The violence of Bucky’s reaction stalled Steve for a moment, startled by his friend’s eagerness for this sort of manhandling.

The pause allowed Bucky the opportunity to regain the fraction of coherence he needed to release the fabric of Steve’s shirt and pull back minutely. Steve’s vision was pulled up from the planes of Bucky’s skin by a gentle nudge under his chin, bringing his eyes up to where Bucky was looking Steve square in the face, though the coquettishness from his earlier gaze had gone.

“This is the part where she’d want you to,” Steve’s hyperfocus on Bucky in the moment allowed him to catch the nervous bob of Bucky’s throat as he gulped- either for more air or due to jitters, Steve couldn’t say. Bucky’s voice was unstable, “She’d want you to give her some fingers. Obviously haven’t got the parts for that though. No pretending about it,” His unwavering stare finally left Steve’s and he glanced away with undisguised unease, “You go much farther south and you’re getting into some dangerous territory.”

Steve hummed thoughtfully, not taking his own gaze off Bucky’s face, which wasn’t even attempting to mask its self-consciousness now. He trailed the tips of his fingers down the cleft of Bucky’s ass experimentally, pleasurably rewarded by his friend’s thick intake of breath, eyes slipping closed almost against their will.

“I dunno,” Steve murmured, bracing himself with the confidence from Bucky’s reactions to be so bold as he was about to be, “Seems like your parts would work just fine to me,” He let this middle finger brush gently against Bucky’s hole, to drive the point home, “If you don’t want something like that, you just say. You’ve already done a lot.”

Bucky’s laugh was wavering, “Haven’t done shit here, Stevie. This has been all you,” Steve pressed his luck again by pressing lightly against that pucker of skin in his friend’s most private place, and Bucky groaned, “But you have no idea how much I want that. _Christ_.”

Steve grunted when Bucky thrust his hips back again, driving the tip of his finger just inside that tight ring of muscle.

“ _Ah_!” Bucky gasped at the intrusion, Steve feeling the ten distinct points of Bucky’s fingers bracing against his slender biceps, “Steve, you gotta… nng,” He trailed off with a groan as Steve withdrew his finger to methodically massage his hole from the outside, marveling at the unfamiliar texture and intimacy of the motion. The other man was rhythmically rocking back against his finger now and Steve was sure he was gonna pass out at how unbearably arousing it was.

“Is this really what it’s like with a dame, Buck?”

“Fuck, I don’t fuckin’ know, Steve, just- just keep doing- _ugh_.”

The skin under his finger seemed mostly dry, moistened only slightly by Bucky’s perspiration, but Steve desperately wanted… He wanted to feel Bucky _inside_. God, but wouldn’t that hurt? Especially without something to smooth the way. In a fit of inspiration, he pulled his unoccupied hand back to wet a few fingers with his mouth, bringing them back to Bucky’s hole and smearing over his dry skin. It was much easier to dip the tip of his finger back into that tight heat, though Steve could tell by the fluttering he felt under the pressure that Bucky was relaxing his ring of muscle to make himself more open to Steve’s explorations. Good lord, he really wanted it.

“Steve,” Bucky groaned, as he dipped forward bracing his forehead against Steve’s temple, his feverish breaths brushing through Steve’s floppy bangs, “ _Fuck_.”

Steve didn’t have the words to respond, so he answered his friend’s desperation by dipping the tip of his finger back into the tight heat of Bucky’s body, spit slicked enough that he could slide in up to his knuckle, unexpectedly. Bucky moaned, and his ass tightened abruptly around Steve’s finger, causing him to choke in surprise. Christ, okay, maybe it was Bucky’s deliberate relaxation _and_ the spit that allowed for the easy entrance, but Lord above it was hot, wetting Bucky up and him making room for it. To test the waters, he thrust his single finger gently in and out of Bucky’s hot channel.

“Yeah, just like that. Dames go wild for that,” Bucky panted.

This time Steve knew just how to respond, “Bucky. Shut _up_ ,” He punctuated the demand with another, much less careful, thrust of his finger, which caused another digit to bump threateningly against the rim clutching at his intrusion greedily.

“Another,” Bucky gasped immediately, “Use _another_ , Steve.”

That left Steve a little less sure of himself, “Are you sure, Buck, its already-”

“ _Christ_ , Steve, ‘m fine. Been open since before th’pub- ya think it’s always this easy without slick?”

Steve paused. “You- what...?”

“ _Sex_ , Steve,” Bucky answered impatiently, “Got fucked before- before I came home. Ya don’t gotta worry ‘bout-”

Steve cut him off, dragging a hand out of Bucky’s pants to pull his friend roughly in for another messy kiss. Fuck, _fuck-_ Bucky’d already been fucked tonight. Bucky was open and loose and ready because another man had already… Steve groaned, both blindingly jealous and unbearably turned on by the thought of Bucky taking another man’s cock hours before Steve got his fingers up in him.

Without hesitation, Steve pulled his finger out and braced to give Bucky another.

Bucky felt it, “Yes, Steve, _yes_.” They slid in almost smoothly, even without more spit to add to it. Bucky hissed, jerking back against the intrusion, “Ugh. C’mon, you can do better than that.”

And fuck, Steve knew Bucky was egging him on, but his stupid best friend knew him better than he knew himself and knew just how to get his way. Bucky knew as well as Steve did how he would answer a challenge like that.

He flexed his buried fingers, reveling in the clutching heat of Bucky’s body. Bucky’s ass flexed against his wrist in return, as Bucky arched back against him. He felt Bucky’s fingers slide back into his hair, taking his face in his hands and moving it the way he pleased, allowing both their mouths to work harder against each other, tongues tangling artlessly, Steve just wanting to be deeper- to consume Bucky completely. Bucky’s sudden aggression freed up Steve’s unoccupied hand to return to business, grasping at one mound of Bucky’s ass, tugging it none-too-gently out of the way, and giving his fingers more room to drive into Bucky without mercy.

Steve went briefly out of his mind, completely subsumed by the wet heat of Bucky’s lips and tongue, the slide of Bucky’s fingers through his hair, the twitching grip of Bucky’s hole around him. He had no idea how much time he lost, focused single mindedly on thrusting into Bucky’s body, exploring his most intimate place, as Bucky worked his mouth against Steve, completely taking over the kiss and thrusting his insistently hard cock against Steve’s hip. His palpable desperation fueled Steve’s fire, and he worked his digits inside Bucky until he thought they were going to cramp. In a moment of lustful motivation, he drew them apart, scissoring Bucky’s hole- testing the extent of Bucky’s openness unashamedly.

That seemed to be Bucky’s breaking point, and he pulled roughly back, meeting Steve’s bleary gaze for the first time in what felt like ages, panting harshly into the scant space between their lips.

“Steve,” Bucky growled, deep and gnarled in his chest in a way Steve hadn’t heard before, “How attached are ya to that virginity deal?”

That snapped Steve out of the pliant, dazed space his mind had wandered to, “W-what?”

Bucky smirked, seeming to gain an ounce of his own footing back in the face of Steve’s sudden bout of hesitancy.

“I _mean…_ you up for a home run?” As if that bullshit baseball speak cleared things up at all… but yeah, Steve supposed he got the message, loud and frighteningly, exhilaratingly clear. Fucking. Bucky was talking about _fucking_.

“You… what? _With me_?”

“Gotta admit, Stevie, you took to everythin’ a lot more, um, _eager_ than I’d expected. Not complaining! Just, ya know, surprised,” He paused, looking for a moment much more sober than Steve knew was the reality for either of them, “You know that this don’ mean you’re queer right? A lot of normal fellas get off on this kinda thing all the time. It happens _all the time_.”

“This seems pretty damn queer, Bucky,” Steve said, timber much higher than he’d like to admit, but fuck- this was curveball he hadn’t seen coming.

“Not really. A hole’s a hole. If ya want it, it doesn’t have to be anything more than practice, just like we’ve been…” Bucky trailed off, looking unsettled again, “It’s only gotta be queer if you’re the one takin’ it. That’s how it is, you know?”

Practice. Christ, Steve’d forgotten how they’d even gotten to this point. Bucky was offering- _again-_ to be Steve’s dress rehearsal for dancing, kissing- _sex_.

“You don’t- you _really_ don’t have t’ do this for me, Buck.”

Bucky let out a soft breath through his nose, and Steve felt his thumbs brush gently against his cheekbones- a weirdly soft gesture to receive while Steve’s fingers were still knuckle deep in Bucky’s ass.

“’M not doing you a goddamn favor here, Steve. Well, it _is_ that, but. Listen, when I… when I play ball… I tend to play _catcher_ , if ya know what I mean. That’s why the fairies ‘n I don’t make time, okay? I _like_ it that way.”

Steve knew that. Of course he knew. That’s how they’d gotten this far- Bucky had had it that way not hours ago, leaving him loose and open enough for Steve’s own exploration. But hearing Bucky say it like that felt heavy and meaningful. It felt real. Like Bucky would really let Steve fuck him.

There were so many reasons not to do this. Steve knew that. _Bucky_ knew that. In the back of his mind, Steve recognized that a sober Bucky would never have allowed this experiment to get so out of control. As much as Bucky enjoyed this, as much as he wanted to help his friend out, Bucky was Steve’s best friend, and that reason alone was enough to warn Steve away from accepting Bucky’s drunken offer.

But Steve was drunk as well. And all those good- _excellent_ reasons not to seemed so far away from this moment.

“Yeah… okay.”

Without ceremony, Bucky withdrew his hands- a bit shakily- from Steve’s face and shoved him in the direction of the bed, dislodging his fingers rather abruptly. Steve sat on their sad, lumpy mattress, not knowing what else to do with himself as Bucky began to root around in their cabinets. They were both quiet, and in the dark, Steve felt the weight of what had been happening in their cramped little room. Of what was about to happen. In the dark of their space, it really could be anyone he was with. But Steve wasn’t drunk enough to forget. He didn’t even think he’d want to. And good Lord above, he wasn’t drunk enough to not recognize how dangerous that was.

That danger was precisely the reason he’d never given those traitorous thoughts a foothold. Thoughts of Bucky’s legs and rear in his too tight trousers. Memories of Bucky swathed in lace and fine women’s clothes. Bucky’s strong features softened by paint and powder. Bucky’s hips as he cruised the floor of his queer pub in the Village.

Bucky was before him again, suddenly, slacks sagging precariously around his thighs, baring the top of his undershorts and the dark dusting of hair trailing down his navel. Steve gulped, suddenly extraordinarily appreciative of the darkness they remained in.

“Hey,” Bucky said softly, drawing Steve’s attention to his face, “Just take it easy, okay? I’ll show ya what to do. I’ll take care of it.”

“Yeah,” Steve answered, not sure how he was supposed to respond to that. To any of this.

“Maybe I should…” Bucky tried, licking his lips and glancing away nervously, “Maybe I should go t’ the water closet-“

“No,” Steve shot back immediately, bolstered by Bucky’s own apparent nerves, “Whatever you gotta do, you can do it here. We’re in this together, right?” Bucky had to know that. Whatever this was- and Steve still wasn’t sure- it was both of theirs, and Bucky shouldn’t have to hide himself away. Not right now.

“Yeah,” Bucky murmured, “Okay.”

With that, Steve began to divest himself, cutting off Bucky’s predictable protest with a look he hoped was clear even in the dim light of the room. He wasn’t going to lose his virginity fully dressed like Bucky was some rough trade. It wasn’t until Steve was shucking his own trousers that Bucky seemed to come back to himself and pushed the remainder of his own clothes off, removing his slacks and drawers in one perfunctory slide.

Steve didn’t look. He was afraid to, and Bucky seemed to know that, because he didn’t push. Bucky seemed like the type who wouldn’t take that sort of behavior from his lovers, ordinarily, but nothing was ordinary about this. He couldn’t bring himself to remove his own underwear yet, but again, Bucky didn’t push. Steve felt the mattress dip as Bucky joined him on the bed, but couldn’t look. He still couldn’t look.

“We don’t gotta do this, Steve. We can stop whenever. M’ serious.”

Steve took a deep breath, “No, you’re right. This is a good idea,” That wasn’t true, but he still didn’t want to stop.

“You look like you’re headed to the gallows, pal.”

“I’m just,” He wet his own lips, suddenly extremely parched, “I just can’t believe this is happenin’.”

He heard Bucky sigh, “Just promise,” He heard the click of what sounded like a lid being removed from a jar and Bucky shifting against the sheets, “Just promise me you’ll tell me if it’s too much, okay? If ya want to back out. Anytime.”

He’d never heard Bucky sound so soft and unsure before. It was completely different from the need and desperation he’d been radiating not a minute ago, and Steve felt guilty. Bucky didn’t deserve to feel unsure about this, just because Steve was acting like a coward.

He looked over at his friend.

Bucky was kneeling on the bed, completely bare- stomach, thighs, _cock_ exposed wholly to the cooling night air. All of a sudden, Steve couldn’t look away from the expanse of revealed skin. Bucky’s legs went on for miles, dusted lightly with dark hair- not a freckle in sight that Steve could make out. His manhood was startlingly erect- Steve had never seen another man bare and aroused before, outside of dirty illustrations. Flushed dark with blood and arousal, jutting proudly up from the juncture of Bucky’s toned thighs, thicker than Steve knew himself to be, but of similar length. It arched dramatically against the quivering plane of Bucky’s naval. Quivering, because Bucky’s hand was out of view behind him, undoubtedly working himself open like Steve had been doing earlier. His breath was coming heavy, head tipped back as it had been when Steve’s fingers had been in Bucky’s place. Only now, his friend’s eyes weren’t shut tight in pleasure, but watching Steve steadily from beneath the thick fan of his lashes.

Bucky didn’t blink at Steve’s attention. Didn’t flinch or show any reaction at all to his gaze.

“I promise,” Steve whispered, meeting Bucky’s eyes, hoping he could convey everything he couldn’t put into words that way.

Bucky just nodded solemnly before reaching that hidden hand out and dipping into the jar Steve had neglected to notice earlier.

“Is that…?”

“Vaseline,” Bucky answered, despite the unfinished question. His voice was still low and soft, but a little steadier than a second ago, “Not as suited as a girl’s slick, obviously, but better than spit, in any case.”

Steve nodded, reaching toward the jar, “Should I-”

“Nah,” Bucky cut him off, “I know what ‘m doing, and like I said, ’m pretty open already. Just needed to wet m’self up a bit.”

“Won’t it… ya know. Hurt? After, um, earlier?”

“Nothin’ ‘m not used to, punk. It’s not so bad once you get used to it.”

“Can’t believe you’re calling _me_ a punk right now.”

Bucky let out a bark of laughter that did more to calm Steve’s nerves than all his previous reassurances, “ _So_ rude, Steven. I look like a punk to you?”

“Not really,” Steve admitted, because it was true. Nothing about Bucky’s masculine features or work hardened body would lead anyone to guess he was anything of the sort.

And then Bucky was drawing his hand out again, scooping up another dollop of jelly, scooting forward toward Steve, “It would help if you had some… _you know_.”

“Oh,” Steve caught on, glancing down toward his own clothed- and only slightly wilted- erection, “Yeah, um, do you want to?”

Bucky looked him straight in the eye, “Yes,” He breathed. With his clean hand, Bucky reached for his waistband, pulling it gently back and over the flushed length of Steve’s own arousal, sucking in a breath.

“Steve,” He murmured, reaching out with his slicked hand, “Wouldn’t guess you were handling this sort of package, lookin’ at you.”

“What does _that_ mean?” Steve snorted, not sure if he should be insulted or not, before gasping as Bucky grasped his cock carefully.

Bucky chuckled, nudging himself more into Steve’s space, legs and arms brushing Steve’s skin at numerous points, “Means ya got a decent cock, Steve. Don’t get ‘em in a twist.”

“S’not much different than yours,” Steve grumbled.

“Well, I do okay for myself.”

They went quiet for a minute as Bucky continued to work the slick onto Steve’s cock, coaxing him steadily back to full hardness. Steadily and _quickly_ , as the sure, loose strokes of Bucky’s large hand took Steve closer to his breaking point than he’d been prepared for. He grasped Bucky’s wrist hurriedly.

“You gotta- I’m gonna…” Bucky snatched his hand back swiftly, tossing Steve a grin somewhere between sheepish and sly.

“Sorry,” Though he really didn’t sound it.

Bucky withdrew from Steve’s space, and he felt cold without all that skin up next to him. He glanced back, watching through the dim light as Bucky piled their thin pillows atop each other before reclining back against them. He looked like something straight out of the dirty rags, if they ever bothered to print men, even men as breath-taking as Bucky.

“Isn’t it easier,” He asked, slowly approaching the spectacle of Bucky’s sprawl, “You know, the other way?”

“Steve, dames want to look at your face while you’re in ‘em. They like that eye contact,” Bucky insisted, parting his thighs as Steve drew closer- and fuck, _fuck_ , it was an inviting gesture, “Only a chump wants t’ do a girl on all fours, their first time.”

Steve was nestled between Bucky’s legs, their most intimate places pressed right up close in all the wrong ( _right_ ) ways. The soft, unblemished skin of Bucky’s inner thighs sliding along Steve’s prominent ribs as his friend shifted and situated to accommodate him. The room spun. Steve was looking down at Bucky beneath him, unable to reconcile their position. Bucky’s chest was heaving, and Steve couldn’t help but reach out to touch the curves of Bucky’s body he had so ardently been exploring earlier. Running his fingers up the ridges of Bucky’s stomach to the tight swells of his pecs. Bucky inhaled tremulously.

“Yeah, tha’s good, Steve.”

A reflection of his earlier touches, he grasped at his friend’s body zealously, kneading and molding his tits as if he were a dame. A peaked nipple slipped between his fingers and he captured it, tweaking it roughly to get Bucky arching and whimpering for him once again. Bucky’s lips parted sinfully as he whined, squirming under Steve’s hands. Steve’s gaze travelled to Bucky’s face and froze there, watching him come undone.

“’M not getting any more ready down here. You can just do it,” Bucky muttered in between despairing noises and sounds, “ _Here_.”

Bucky reached between them, taking Steve’s cock in hand again with cautious touches, directing it where it needed to go. Steve still hadn’t taken his eyes of his friend’s face, but he felt it when the head of his cock met the pucker of Bucky’s entrance. The unyielding pressure of Bucky’s ring of muscle, coated and covered in the thick texture of Vaseline, so different from the vaguely damp quality of before. Curiously, Steve slipped one hand down to feel for himself the new sloppiness of Bucky’s twitching hole. His questing fingers had Bucky tilting his hips to allow for better access. A dip of his finger into his body confirmed that Bucky’s preparations continued up into the heat of his channel, wetting him up all the way in.

“You gotta,” Bucky gasped, his rim convulsing around Steve’s finger as he withdrew, “With a dame its easy… to just slide in. Now, you gotta,” Without removing his guiding hand from Steve’s length, Bucky’s other hand reached around, pressing insistently against the small of his back, urging him forward, trying to wedge his cock into the throbbing gash of his well-prepared hole. Bucky undulated beneath him, rubbing his ass lewdly against the looming intrusion. His entrance fluttered tantalizingly against the head as Bucky’s body relaxed into it, “Just… _just_ …”

With a sudden give, the head slipped inside.

Steve gasped, louder than before, at the same time that Bucky moaned, wanton and loud enough that Steve spared his first thought of the night for their neighbors. The split second of concern didn’t last long, as Bucky’s implacable hand on his back continued to guide him deeper, until half of his cock was surrounded in the smooth, raw warmth of Bucky’s ass. The unexpectedly easy slide ceased abruptly, and Steve growled to himself, desperate to bury his length completely in the man under him. He gave his own meager thrust, attempting, only to be answered by a grunt of discomfort.

“Hold on, big guy,” Bucky grumbled, before reaching back and relocating one of their pillows to cradle the small of his back, “Okay, go.”

And with the changed angle, Steve tried again, twitching his hips toward Bucky’s core, and was relieved when his hipbones came to rest against the meat of Bucky’s ass.

“ _Oh my god_ ,” He huffed, overwhelmed by the pleasure. Every inch of him was bombarded by the sensation of heat and pressure and slick of Bucky’s body and Vaseline, gripping him on all sides. He was so tight- _too_ tight, and Steve knew he wouldn’t last long. He just prayed he didn’t embarrass himself too bad.

Bucky laughed, sounding a bit hysterical, “Yeah, that sounds about right.”

“You’re just… I’m _inside_ you. I can’t… does it hurt?”

Bucky hummed in response, “No, it’s fine,” He breathed, “But just give me a second.”

Steve waited, very consciously stilling his body from moving and taking Bucky like it wanted to. Bucky, on his end, had his eyes slipped shut, twisting and flexing slightly around the unforgiving length buried inside him, letting his insides adjust. Experimentally, Steve moved a hand (when had he grabbed Bucky’s hips?) to brush against Bucky’s rim, stretched taut around the hardness of Steve’s cock. The feeling- the _thought_ \- sent another bolt of fire shooting down his spine to his groin.

Bucky was breathing hard, much harder than before, and Steve couldn’t help but worry that this was actually hurting him.

“We can stop if it’s-“

“Don’t you fuckin’ dare,” Bucky gasped, blinking his eyes open to glare at Steve, “It’s not- it’s not what you think. I’m just,” He exhaled sharply, reaching out to tug Steve down so he had to brace his hands to either side of Bucky’s torso. The position wasn’t great for his back, but like hell Steve was going to complain at a time like this. Bucky’s thighs slid up until Steve was snug between the vice of them, “Just _move_ , alright?”

Steve couldn’t help but obey, shifting back to pull out as gently as he could. It wasn’t as smooth as he’d have liked- the muscle of Bucky’s channel holding tight, clutching at him, trying to keep him embedded in that relentless heat. For his part, Bucky had a look of intense concentration as Steve moved, breathing rapidly and wedging his eyes shut.

He couldn’t bring himself to pull out all the way, too consumed to bear it. Instead, when about halfway free, Steve reversed course and began the maddening plunge back into Bucky’s ass, gripping the top of Bucky’s thigh for leverage, despite his spine’s discomfort.

“Steve, _Steve_ ,” Bucky warned, as he fucked back into him, but it was too late apparently. All those tight muscles surrounding his cock suddenly tightened- as if that should have been possible- clamping and clenching rhythmically as Bucky groaned and hissed, hands gripping desperately at any part of Steve he could reach, “Fuck, fuck, _fuck_!”

With a start, Steve took his first hard look at Bucky’s own cock, jerking and twitching as his friend came, ejaculating all over that toned stomach in watery white spurts. Bucky rode it out, baring down seemingly unconsciously on Steve’s cock where it remained packed inside him.

“What… oh jeez, what did I-?” Steve gasped, unsure of what had happened- aside from the very obvious.

“ _Keep goin’_ ,” Bucky snarled, and Steve didn’t even think about contradicting him.

Not waiting a second for Bucky to get impatient, Steve began to thrust again, attempting to start slow. Rolling his hips as smoothly as he could, he drove himself inside Bucky’s still weakly convulsing body, reveling in the hot clutch and Bucky’s breathy moans as he came down, mingling with the soft slaps of skin on skin.

Steve could hardly breath. He could hardly think. His every thought, every breath focused utterly on driving into Bucky over and over, impaling the other man on his cock. Bucky continued to groan and pant against him, slices of pale blue-grey irises catching Steve’s from beneath heavy lids. Bucky loved it. Bucky _wanted_ it. He was panting and desperate, even after coming, for a cock – _Steve’s_ cock – stuffed up inside him. It drove Steve _wild_. An angle changed somewhere in their rutting, and suddenly Bucky was crying out, writhing around Steve’s cock, voice caught somewhere between pain and pleasure.

“Oh,” _Thrust_. “ _Oh god_ ,” _Thrust_. “Yes,” _Thrust_. “Fuck,” _Thrust_. “ _Fuck_ ,” _Thrust_. _“Yes_ ,” _Thrust_. “ _Steve_!” _Thrust_. “ _Nng_!”

He panted brokenly between his cries, speech jarred by Steve’s merciless thrusts colliding with his body, jerking him against their stale mattress. Bucky wasn’t even hard. His cock was only about half mast, but Bucky didn’t even seem to notice. Every movement of Bucky’s was sluggish in a way it hadn’t been, even while in his cups. It was like he was drunk on Steve’s cock and _Christ_ , this man was intoxicating all on his own. Steve wanted to own him. Steve wanted to keep taking Bucky apart forever. He wanted to spill inside and have Bucky take that piece of Steve with him. He wanted to snuff out every other man who’d seen Bucky like this- desperate and hungry to be fucked. He wanted Bucky’s mouth. His ass. His cock. His soul. They’d been each other’s their entire lives, and _now this_.

Bucky’s legs shifted, curling gently around Steve’s hips without putting any pressure on Steve’s touchy spine, and that was it. That small consideration, on top of Bucky’s unabashed wantonness, and the unbearable, fever pitch heat of his ass was what it took to send Steve over the edge. Steve’s entire body seized, twitching uncontrollably as he came silently, frozen as deep inside Bucky as he could wedge himself, fingers cleaving ten lust-addled bruises against Bucky’s hipbones.

In the throes of it, Steve staring down at his friend like he couldn’t possibly be real, Bucky opened his eyes and their gazes met. In that bright, perfect, clear moment as his orgasm peaked and Bucky’s eyes locked on his, he only had one intelligible thought.

There was no coming back from this.


	2. you bring out my terrible: WWII Steve/Bucky

Bucky hadn’t experienced this level of quiet in what felt like years.

First there was Brooklyn, a constant low thrum of activity and life in the city. Then there was war. The unceasing chaos of camps and combat that you learned to live with or risk losing your sanity. And finally, Krieshberg, and the buzz of anxiety and fear that had taken root in the furthest corners of his mind, even in times of perfect quiet.

Now, within the confines of a cottage miles outside of war stricken London, something within Bucky was shaken lose that he thought had trapped him forever.

The soft thunk of Steve setting down his rucksack had him thinking he might know the reason for the sudden quieting of his turmoil.

But even the quiet was deafening. Unbearable. Because all it left behind was _emptiness_. Forcing him to acknowledge for the first time the pieces of him that had been carved out along the way.

“I know it’s only for a few days,” Steve was saying, “But it’s all I could get from the Colonel. They’ll have made up their minds what to do with us by the end of the week.”

They’d touched down in London less than 24 hours ago after being whisked away from the Italian Front following their dramatic return to the 107th base of operations. Steve’s dame had convinced the Colonel to grant Steve a bout of leave as the brass deliberated on what was to become of ‘Captain America’ and the rest of the Hydra Factory prisoners of war. Bucky knew Steve was angling to be put back in the thick of it, the bastard, but in the end it wasn’t Steve’s decision to make.

Bucky didn’t know what he wanted. Though the choices were obvious, he was dreading the moment when Steve would ask.

“I know there’s not much space, but we’ve worked with less, right? It’ll be just like we’re back home.”

“Home didn’t have this many cobwebs,” Bucky shot back mildly, glancing around the one room dwelling for the first time, “And then there’s the fact that we’re _miles_ away from our closest neighbors. Ain’t exactly familiar circumstances.”

Of course, Steve wouldn’t have any of the SSR officers’ protests against taking Sergeant Barnes with him on his little retreat into the English countryside. In fact, he’d bargained for the shore leave of all the returned captives who’d accompanied them to headquarters. With Carter’s help, many of them we’re probably up to their gills in Irish whiskey back at the most proximal cantina to the barracks. Bucky distantly wished he were among them, though he hadn’t even bothered arguing with Steve when his friend had dragged him along with to the train station. He knew better than that at this point in his life, and honestly, he just didn’t have the energy to meet Steve Rogers in a battle of wills.

“Alright, it ain’t exactly Flushing Av, I’ll give you that,” Steve chucked, brushing past Bucky, “But it isn’t bad.”

Bucky hummed, assuming Steve would take it as agreement and let it drop.

It was so fucking quiet.

God, he needed a drink. Or twenty.

“You bring any hooch along on this little sojourn?” He asked, finally settling down his own meager pack.

“Um, no,” Steve admitted, and Bucky felt his frustration at their situation rising. He was confident none of that showed on his face though, “It doesn’t really affect me the same as it used to, and I figured you could do without for a minute, considering.”

“Gee, thanks for makin’ that call for me, pal. That’s real sweet of ya,” And okay, maybe that came off a little grouchier than he’d intended, but it’d been a difficult week, all things considered.

Steve scowled back at him, “I was just trying help, Buck. I can’t imagine what you went through over there, but I wanted to give you some time to sort yourself out. Can’t do much of that when you’re blacked out in a puddle of your own spit up.”

“Whatever, Steve. Just drop it, alright? We’re here now and that’s that.”

“You don’t really seem all that happy about it.”

Bucky couldn’t even attempt to hold back his irritated whine as he collapsed back on the – _singular_ – mattress, “To be honest, I ain’t. The second they let me out of that debrief all I wanted was to get blitzed, maybe punch a few guys, and enjoy a nice long fuck, if I was real lucky. But now I’m _here_ , asshole, and I don’t know any of this fucking quiet is supposed to help heal my soul or whatever you thought would happen here.”

Steve blanched, “You wanted- what the hell Bucky, you were on that table _less than a week ago_ , and now you want to be out there cruising already? That’s a horrible idea.”

“Nothin’ better for what ails ya, punk. At least it would have gotten me outta my head for a few hours. I don’t even know what we’re supposed to _do_ with ourselves out here in bumfuck nowhere. We ain’t even got _electricity_.”

“C’mon, Buck. How many summers did we spend doing a whole lot of nothin’ in the city? You weren’t complaining then.”

“Do I really gotta spell out for you the difference between now and then, Steve?”

“I just thought-“

“Yeah, you just _thought_. You’re full of those lately it seems. _I_ thought I was takin’ all the stupid with me, but clearly- _clearly_ I was mistaken and you had some stashed away in case of emergency.”

Steve sighed noisily, though it came out more as a groan, “Are we back to that again?”

“We ain’t _never_ gonna be done with _that_ , Steve. I’m not gonna let you off the hook for _that_ until the day I kick the bucket.”

“Jesus- you would have _died_ , Bucky. If I hadn’t-“

“Shut up. Just _shut up_ , Steve. I don’t want to hear it again. I’m tired- I’m _so_ tired of arguing. I’ve had the week- the _year_ from hell so just… just let me enjoy this peace and quiet you’ve so kindly decided to shove down my throat. I don’t want to hear another word from you until fuckin’ dinner, you got it?”

And for once in his life, Steven Grant Rogers took a fucking hint.

\--

Jesus, he’s promised himself he’d never do this again.

It was the dead of night on their second day of leave, and the moment Steve stepped back inside from his trip to the outhouse, Bucky pounced.

He’d promised himself he wouldn’t put himself through this again.

Bucky covered Steve’s mouth with his own before his friend could even begin to protest. It was brutal. His tongue was pushing past Steve’s slack lips without hesitation, making his intentions clear without having to say a word, plundering Steve’s mouth like he’d find his rapidly slipping sanity somewhere in its depths. His hands gripped the unfamiliar planes of Steve’s ribs, hard enough have cracked them back in Brooklyn. He kissed rough, without mercy for a good half minute before reining in his aggression- he didn’t remove his lips from Steve’s, but gave the other man the chance to either push him away or submit.

If Steve pushed him away now, Bucky’s cracked casing would shatter apart completely. He was coming apart at the seams and he needed- he needed _out of his fucking head_.

But he had to give Steve the opportunity to say no, no matter what it would do to him.

They breathed into each other’s mouths before a few unending moments.

And then Steve’s hands came up, cupping Bucky’s face between his palms, pulling Bucky back in. Bucky gasped, nearly sobbing his relief against Steve’s lips.

Without further ado, the violence of Bucky’s assault resumed, and he was fucking Steve’s mouth with his tongue. This was nothing like his gentle coaxing and rehearsal from years ago. Then, Bucky had bent his own desires to what Steve had needed- a guiding hand, a boost of confidence, a gentle experience to pave the way. Here, Bucky gave no quarter. Here, Bucky would take everything Steve would give him and let the consequences work themselves out later.

Bucky needed to fill in all the dark spaces that had taken root inside him, and he prayed Steve would give him that. If just this once.

After taking his due time relearning Steve’s mouth, Bucky tore himself away, nipping just this side of too sharp along the defined ridge of Steve’s jaw. It was fuller and squarer than the familiar profile that was carved into his psyche, but underneath the varnish and shine, it was still _Steve_. He continued to make his way down Steve’s throat, sucking bruises along the way and taking savage pride in the astonished sounds Steve gave him in return.

He’d _promised_ himself.

His lips eventually found the collar of Steve’s undershirt and began the battle of wresting it off his torso immediately. As the fabric came up and off, Bucky briefly mourned his friend. _His_ Steve, from home. Who _was_ his home. Who he’d practically seduced under the guise of _practice_ years ago. Who he’d taken inside him with selfish relish, even though he’d broken his own heart in the process.

He’d promised that would be the only time he let his greedy, masochistic heart take the wheel.

And here they were.

 So yeah, he mourned Steve’s body. The slightness of him that belayed a surprising strength- both of body and heart. The body of the boy - and then the man – Bucky had, quite willingly, fallen hard and fast for. Because for all the pains, small and large, that had come from it, Bucky would never, _ever_ regret loving Steve with everything he had.

But Jesus Christ, this wasn’t a bad consolation prize.

Almost everything about Steve’s outward frame had been altered by the SSR experiments. If you removed the fact that this was Steve from the equation, he was everything that set Bucky’s heart racing. Strong, fit, solid. Sturdy enough to take Bucky’s body apart and put it back together- really make him feel it. The power thrumming through Steve’s new body promised all that and more. The possibilities had Bucky breathless, in addition to the shakes and twitches stemming from his beyond frayed nerves. Christ, he needed to get this moving before he could talk himself out of this terrible decision.

Without giving himself another second to overthink it, Bucky began working his way down the hills and valleys of Steve’s frankly unreal chest and stomach. All that smooth, firm muscle, so so different from the body he knew, but satisfying to have under his fingers, his lips, all the same. Steve’s breath was heaving, heart beating violently against his ribs, and rising as Bucky worked him over. Bucky could never recall being able to make out his heartbeat so clearly before. And if there was one thing he was thankful of, it was that Steve’s idiotic habit of taking stupid risks had at least granted him a reprieve from his persistent ailments. He caressed, licked, sucked, and kissed every swell of flesh as if giving thanks for that gift, even if it was the same stroke of good fortune that would soon be putting Steve in very real, very mortal danger.

However, it was all just a detour on the way to the main event. In no time, Bucky was on his knees, working open Steve’s sleep pants, tugging them down his hips and over the revelation that was Steve’s enhanced cock.

Holy Hell.

“Oh my God, Steve,” He breathed, taking it in, inhaling the heady musk of Steve’s arousal. He was already _dripping_ with pre-come.

“Yeah… that’s a bit different, too,” Steve croaked, gulping for breath. He sounded like he was about to go on, so Bucky cut in, getting a firm grip on the base on Steve’s dick. Christ on a crutch, it was _thick_.

“No talking,” He hissed, diving forward and licking a broad, wet stripe from root to tip. He moaned around the heated flesh- _fuck_ , Steve tasted like freedom. Wasn’t that just fitting.

Determined to erase whatever composure Steve had regained during Bucky’s brief moment of awe, he applied himself right away to performing the greatest suck job in his long and satisfying history of them. Fuck, he’d missed the sensation of senses that came with having a mouth full of cock. And Steve’s was the ultimate prize. Long- the longest Bucky’d ever taken- and thick enough that his fingers just barely encircled it, it was a chore to get half of the thing in his mouth. That was fine. He’d work up to that. And sweet Jesus, it was hot. Bucky’d come to realize how hot Steve in general tended to run, these days; but this. This was a rod of red hot iron between Bucky’s lips, throbbing with life. But the best part, the part that had Bucky scrabbling to get at his dick to relieve his own intense arousal, was the weight. God, the solid heft of Steve’s cock against Bucky’s tongue was perfect. It took up space, made room for itself, pressing up against lips, cheeks, and his palettes as he bobbed vigorously, wetting up Steve’s prick with intent. Massaging the underside with his tongue, he could feel the pulse and throb of blood under his ministrations- heightening Steve’s arousal, as his friend’s blissful gasps and groans confirmed above him.

“Oh, Bucky- _God_ , Bucky. _Shit_!”

Bucky got off on his partners getting off on him. Proudly. But heaven help him, it was _Steve_. Hearing Steve crying out his name, being able to give him that kind of pleasure- Bucky couldn’t describe the feeling. He’d been getting off on the elaborate fantasy, and the precious memories, of it since he knew what his dick was _for_.

He’d promised himself.

Knowing this was his only shot, Bucky stepped up his game. It was a battle against his own body now, because was going to cram as much of Steve’s glorious cock in his mouth as he could before it suffocated him. He’d obliterated his reflex to gag ages ago, and applied that well-honed skill now, relaxing his mouth and jaw until the thick, blunt head of Steve’s cock was bumping rhythmically against his soft palette and the urge to choke on it drifted into the back of his mind. His focus felt trance-like, and he melted into it like a warm bath, humming with pleasure was that tip made the tight slide back until Bucky’s air was cut off, and Steve’s dick was down his throat.

“Oh, _fuck_!” Steve shouted as Bucky swallowed, working his prize like he’d be getting a medal for his service. This was it, this was truly his magnum opus of suck jobs, and it was for Steve.

He pulled himself off gently, working Steve’s shaft and tonguing the head, then breathing deep before diving back down. He may be a bit out of practice but Bucky had _stamina_ , and hell or high water, he’d use every ounce of it to get Steve off.

He may not get to keep him, but he was going to _ruin_ _him_ for everyone else or die trying.

His hardened focus on the task at hand had Steve’s pleasured cries fading into the background. Soon, the only sensations he registered were the hot, hard length between his lips and the hot, hard flesh of Steve’s hips flexing and writhing beneath his fingertips. Steve was actively pumping now, but Bucky could take it. _Did_ take it, welcoming each thrust of Steve’s cock down his throat with a delighted hum, which only served to wind Steve tighter. Spit and pre-come coated his lips and chin, and he must have looked like an absolute wreck, but Bucky couldn’t have even attempted to find a fuck to give, lost in the bliss of Steve using his mouth.

He couldn’t have said how much time had passed before Steve was patting- basically _smacking_ \- his shoulder, “Fuck, _fuck_ \- I’m gonna- _Bucky_ -“

That warning had Bucky’s awareness flooding back in a heartbeat.

Like hell Steve was gonna come anywhere but Bucky’s ass tonight.

With urgency, Bucky took hold of Steve’s cock again, gripping it mercilessly around the base, ignoring Steve’s indignant howl. Steve’s dick slid easily out of his mouth, and Bucky gasped instinctively as his lungs came back to themselves. He held them both still, letting Steve’s climax taper away and working his own throat to assess the damage. Definite bruising, and he might not have much of a voice tomorrow, but it couldn’t have been more worth it.

Preparing himself for his next move, Bucky glanced up at Steve, who was panting above him, head thrown back against the wall and eyes screwed shut tight- obviously winded from his brush with orgasm. But fuck it. He was a goddamn supersoldier now. He could take it.

He spared a second to wipe his face before rising to his feet, thanking whatever deities still watched over him that his knees and back felt miraculously unharmed after so long crouched on the unforgiving wood floor. With haste, he shoved his pants the rest of the way off before rising to his full height once more.

Steve gazed at him helplessly when they were level again, “Bucky, _what_ -“

“Shh,” Bucky murmured, with deceptive gentleness, before swinging his weight around until they’d traded places and Bucky’s back was thumping against the wall. Steve blinked in what looked like shock- what, like just because he was a marvel of human innovation he couldn’t be manhandled anymore? Please, Steve.

Bucky didn’t waste a second before snatching up Steve’s hands- at least a part of him that was still the same size, besides that honker of a beak- and placing them with deliberation on the backs of his bared thighs. Hoping Steve got the message, Bucky was bracing himself on Steve’s sturdy shoulders and hoisting himself into the air.

“ _Jesus_ , Bucky- what are you-“

Luckily, Steve’s reflexes were faster than his comprehension skills at the moment, and he caught Bucky as he settled in with his back against the wall and his thighs around Steve’s waist.

Steve was most certainly taken aback by this new development, if his wide eyes and gape were of any indication.

“You’re catching flies, Rogers. We doing this or what?” Bucky prompted dryly, with an audible rasp after the abuse his throat had taken, tugging Steve closer and arching his hips to rub his ass against the hardness of Steve’s exposed cock.

“You can’t be serious, Buck,” Steve answered, though he choked a bit, which had Bucky smirking.

“See anyone else I could be talking to ‘round here?”

“Don’t get smart with me, asshole.”

“It’s nowhere your dick ain’t been before.”

“Oh, so we’re finally acknowledging that happened then? I see how it is.”

“You want to know how it is, Steve,” Bucky snarled, fisting his hands in Steve’s hair and drawing him viciously forward until their lips were but a hair’s breadth apart, “I’m going _out of my mind_. I can’t _sleep_. I can barely _eat_. I can’t close my eyes without seein’ that damn table and I’m fallin’ apart here. It’s too fuckin’ _quiet_ and my head is so fuckin’ _loud_ ; it’s like I got static up there- or a whole swarm of bees and I’m fuckin’ _cracking_. Don’t you get it? I show up back there acting like a motherfucking loony and they’re gonna white card me home faster than you can blink. So, unless you plan letting me deal with this the only way I know how, I’d best start packing my bags now. _That is how it is_.”

Steve looked shell-shocked, but he hadn’t dropped Bucky yet, so that was something. Bucky wanted to beg him to say something- anything, but he couldn’t be the one to break their silence, after that kind of outburst.

After a minute, Steve gave, “And how exactly do you plan to deal with it then?”

Bucky let go of Steve’s hair, allowing him to stand a bit straighter. His palms slid to Steve’s shoulders as he looked his oldest friend in the eye, “By begging you to fuck me until I can’t think anymore.”

“Bucky…” Steve sounded about as close to devastated as Bucky had heard since Sarah passed, and that was just icing on the damn cake. Bucky _hated_ hurting Steve.

“I’m _sorry_. I’d go to anyone else if I could, Steve, but I feel like I’m at the end of my rope here,” He glanced down, ashamed that part of that assertion felt like a falsehood. The truth was, he didn’t just want to get browned, he wanted it to be _Steve_. He wanted just for one minute to be as close as possible to the one person on the fucking planet who he’d live and die for if given the chance. He just couldn’t tell Steve that.

Steve sighed, “Do I even have a choice about this?”

Bucky’d gaze snapped up, “Of course you fuckin’ have a choice. You didn’t seem interested in tapping out a minute ago, but you can always so _no_. I’m cracked up but I’m not fuckin’ fragile.”

Taking that as his answer, Bucky loosened his vice lock on Steve’s waist, only for those large hands to hike him up higher as Steve leaned in to pin him more thoroughly against the wall.

“You really think you need that from me, Buck?”

Bucky closed his eyes, tormented by how wretched he felt, “God, yes, _please_.” _Just take me out of my head._

Bucky wanted to cry when he felt Steve’s fingers slide from the backs of his thighs to the meat of his ass as Steve adjusted his grip, “Then I guess I’m with you, Buck.”

“… _Steve_?”

“Yeah, I’m with you,” Steve said again, tightening his hold on Bucky ass and drawing a needy whine from the depths of Bucky’s abused throat, “But how…?”

“Like this,” Bucky gasped, feeling the blood heating in his veins again now that they were really gonna do this, “Just like this,” He pressed into Steve’s grasp to drive the point home.

“Wouldn’t it be better if,” Steve glanced back toward the bed they’d both abandoned.

“ _No_ ,” Bucky insisted, knowing he was sounding truly desperate but unable to help it, “Like _this_. _Please_.”

“Buck, I…” Steve was struggling for words, “You don’t understand I… there was this gal, on the tour, we… With all these changes, I could hurt you if we do this wrong.”

Okay, they’d have to get back to _that_ later, but for now, “I can take it, Steve. If hurts a bit… well, maybe that’s what I want. I don’t want to be able to _sit down_ without thinkin’ about it. I want to feel it in me for _days_. We can do it like this.”

Steve groaned, sounding a bit wrecked already, and they’d barely gotten started, “Fuck, Bucky, you can’t just _say_ shit like that.”

Bucky laughed, definitely a bit hysterical, beginning to squirm in Steve’s grasp, “I’ll say a lot worse than that if you don’t get to it, Rogers.”

“You gotta promise me, Buck,” Steve insisted, but began sliding a hand toward where Bucky needed it, “You gotta promise me you’ll tell me if it’s too much, okay?”

Bucky paused his persistent writhing to look Steve in the eye. It was the least he could do with what Steve was willing to offer him, “I promise.”

Steve was trailing his fingers down the cleft of Bucky’s ass now, and fuck, Bucky just needed those fingers in him. A minute of careful fondling later, Steve’s dipped in between his cheeks to feel his hole, then sucked in a breath.

“Bucky?”

“Yeah, I took care of that already. Had some slick in our med kit.”

“You just,” He released a winded sound against Bucky’s collarbone, “Jesus, Buck.”

“I told you I-“ He cut off with a gasp as Steve wedged a finger inside without warning, “ _Oh_.”

“When was the last time…?”

“Awhile ago. Few day before Azzano, I think,” Bucky answered distractedly, more intent on arching back to get more of that finger inside him. No, he wanted _another_ and he wanted it yesterday.

“Before…? Fuckin’ hell, Buck, you’ve been cruising _your_ _unit_?”

“Yeah, I’m the good time girl of the 107th, yadda yadda. Can we talk about my conduct violations _later_?”

“Jesus Christ, Bucky, you’re something else, I’ll tell you that.”

“ _Steven Grant Rogers_. If you’re gonna do it, _do it already_. I swear t’ God, I will knock your goddamn perfect teeth in,” Steve gave him a disgruntled look and pulled his finger away, but just before Bucky could really lay into him, he felt Steve’s cock pressing right up where it need to be, “ _Yes_ , do it.”

Bucky didn’t even give Steve a chance to comply before he was baring down, taking the head in with practiced ease. That was enough to get Steve moving. A second later he gave a solid thrust, sliding in to the hilt. Steve hissed a breath through the grit of his teeth. Bucky groaned, loud and obscene. God, it was so much better than he remembered, having Steve breach him. And he remembered it being pretty damn amazing. Steve’s cock hadn’t been much to write home about, all things considered. Sure, it was a good size, though about average at the end of the day- the important part was that it was _Steve_.

But, _God_ , this was Steve, too. And his cock was unreal.

Even though Bucky’d prepped himself as thoroughly as he could manage while Steve’d been doing his business, they certainly hadn’t taken their time on that first go, and the significant burn after the first slide in made that clear. He’d taken his share of dicks - like a goddamn _champion_ , thank you - in his time, but Bucky was reasonably sure none of them could compare to the glorious beast that was the cock currently splitting him open. Christ, it’d been years since the initial stretch felt like that.

The burn faded gradually, and in its wake, another sort of fire came to the fore.

“Go, _go_ ,” He hissed, batting his leg against Steve’s ass to get the bastard moving, and urging which Steve obeyed promptly.

The first few solid thrusts had Bucky groaning from the sheer pleasure of the fresh stretch of his ass around Steve’s impressive girth. He hoped that wrung out feeling lasted but wasn’t holding out much hope. If there was one thing this ass was more than acclimated to, it was getting fucked, and fucked _hard_ , supersoldier or no. He felt the weighty intrusion right up into his guts, thick and solid inside him. The angle wasn’t right to nail his prostate dead on, but the thickness alone was enough to send the beginnings of that particular pleasure dancing up his spine. There wasn’t a spot inside him that Steve’s massive cock couldn’t touch, even in passing. Each subsequent pounding from Steve’s hips drove Bucky into the wall with gusto and he didn’t even attempt to reign in his debauched moans. _Christ_ , this was just what the doctor ordered.

As the remnant aches of the initial breaching faded away, Bucky’s wits gradually returned, and he could make out the slap of Steve’s heavy balls against his ass and the thuds of his body against the wall as Steve went to town on his ass.

“You alright, Buck?” Steve gasped against his ear, already sounding out of breath and jarred by each thrust as it hit home, “I can slow dow-“

“Don’t you fuckin’ dare, asshole,” Bucky snarled, clenching his inner muscles in retaliation, which drew out a particularly brutal thrust from his friend and a positively wrecked moan from Bucky, “ _I could do this all day_.”

Steve growled, and Bucky felt those huge hands against his ass, griping and spreading his cheeks wider as Steve picked up the pace, and Bucky had to consciously hold back the urge to start howling on that cock, “Be careful what you wish for, jerk.”

“Big…” _Thrust_. “Talk…” _Thrust_. “ _Punk_.” _Thrust_.

That seemed to be just the motivation Steve needed to really get seriously down to business, because he suddenly drew Bucky’s hips away from the support of the wall, driving into him with fierce, merciless thrusts. He supported the majority of Bucky’s not insubstantial weight on with his freakishly strong arms alone, leaving Bucky’s shoulders to scrape against the wood grain. If he was lucky he’d be setting some souvenir friction burns out of this, too.

And while the tender ache had officially vanished into the night, the thick wonder that was Steve’s dick continued to impress. He’d never been this full of cock in his life, stuffed to the absolute brim with it, writhing and clenching around the unforgiving invasion of that beautiful cock. He thought it had just been his months of forced abstinence that had made Steve seem like such a revelation, but no. He was truly skewered on the grandmaster of all dicks, body split open and loving it as Steve tore his pleasure out of him like an exorcism.

But like hell he wasn’t going to use Steve for all he was worth.

“That all you got, Stevie?” He managed to grunt around the groans and grunts Steve wrung from him.

“Jesus, you’re a chore, Barnes,” Steve growled back, but the breathless wonder underneath his surly tone belayed his posturing. Contrarily though, Steve’s merciless thrusts began to slow.

Bucky was about to protest- loudly – when he felt one of Steve’s hand and slink down, prodding the place where Bucky’s rim was pulled taut and tight around his cock, sliding along the throbbing place where they were joined. Steve sucked in a harsh breath.

“Fuck,” He breathed, “Doesn’t seem like it should fit.”

“Give me… a bit more credit… than that, Steve,” Bucky gasped, beginning to arch his hips, attempting to work himself back onto that cock if Steve wasn’t planning on obliging him, “Fits _perfect_.”

“Yeah?” Steve answered, cheekily working the edge of a finger in alongside his dick, causing Bucky to groan in appreciation at the further pressure against his battered hole, “You like ‘em big, Buck? You like choking on it and having ‘em fill you up until you taste it in the back of your throat?”

Steve’ dirty words had Bucky clenching and grinding down on his length instinctively, “Christ, yes. Bigger the better. Like it hard and fast, making my tight ass _take_ it. You think you can really make me feel it, Rogers? Make me forget about every other cock I’ve shoved up there? You know this ain’t my first goddamn rodeo.”

Please, Steven. Like Bucky could give it back as good as Steve dish it.

Steve groaned, before returning his fingers to that bruising grip and pounding Bucky with renewed vigor. The maddening slap of skin returned, and Bucky wanted to drown in the sounds and sensation of it forever. The burn may have vanished, but the pleasure of feeling a good, thick cock sliding up in him over and over was going strong. Hell, Bucky was proud of himself- a secret part of his brain may have also wondered it getting that monster inside of him was even physically possible. Good thing he knew better than to second guess his cock thirsty ass.

“C’mon, Steven. Gotten it harder from fairies in the Village. Thought you were some kinda supersoldier now? Dirty me up proper, why don’t ya?”

He loved drawing those challenged growls from Steve. Pull the right strings and Steve was putty in Bucky’s hands. Steve didn’t disappoint, reaching around to draw Bucky’s thigh higher, until his calf was supporting him against one of those wide, stacked shoulders. It nearly bent Bucky in half, but good Lord above, he could work with this.

He only had to bare down just a titch before Steve’s rigid length was brutalizing his prostate on every thrust.

“Fuck, fuck, fuck, _Steve, right_ _there_.”

He hadn’t felt this alive since Brooklyn. Steve’s impossible cock was demanding and delicious inside him, pushing him harder and farther than he’d ever gone. Every move and flex had Steve driving implacably against his inner walls, driving wanton and desperate moans from him with every shove against his swollen prostate.

Something in Bucky’s voice must have inspired something in Steve, because suddenly those lips that had captured him since he was fourteen were smashed against him, licking into Bucky’s mouth like he was the last glass of water in the goddamn desert. One of Steve’s massive hands came up, clenching his thumb against the hinge of Bucky’s jaw, forcing him open wider for Steve’s assault. His other hand remained holding Bucky’s weight, but still managing to knead and clutch Bucky’s ass, stretching his rim tighter and pulling him apart to make way for Steve’s marvel of a cock.

Not a beat later, the hand against Bucky’s face retreated southward again, and then Bucky really was howling, as Steve clutched his hips, lifting him up and pulling him down to thoroughly impale him on Steve’s girth. With gravity and Steve’s strength both working to completely undo him, Bucky felt his composure truly begin to slip.

“ _Oh_ , shit, Steve. Fuck. _Fuck_. Fuck me harder. Wreck my ass. Fuckin’ make me _take it_. Just like that. Won’t even be able to close up later after your cock’s finished.”

That worked to push Steve harder, and it felt like Bucky was getting fucked by a jackhammer, and hard meat of Steve’s thighs pounding against the flesh of Bucky’s ass as Steve took control and let go. Christ above, if Bucky wasn’t careful, it would be him getting ruined for all of there cocks, after taking this fucking supersoldier. By all accounts, the assault should be painful and unpleasant, with how hard Steve could shoving into him, forcing Bucky’s body to accommodate his fantastically impossible new body and strength. Bucky honestly hadn’tve thought either of them had it in ‘em to go this hard and still want more. He didn’t know how his own body was handling being at Steve’s mercy but like hell was he complaining.

And then Steve seemed to lose it completely, gripping Bucky hard enough that he could feel the points of Steve’s fingers grinding into bone as Steve somehow managed to pick of the pace, thrusting wildly and animalistic into Bucky’s ass like his life depended on it. Through the haze of his building pleasure, Bucky realized what was come.

“That’s fuckin’ it, Steve. Come inside. Wet me up. Fuckin’ make me drip with it,” He panted, tightening everything- his hands barely holding on to Steve’s neck, his thighs around Steve, his ass around Steve’s cock.

He hadn’t even realized Steve’s eyes had been closed until they were snapping open, cool blue green meeting Bucky’s gaze unflinchingly has he gasped, thumbs carving deep indents against Bucky’s hipbones. And then Steve was coming, crying out into the dark of their cottage like Bucky’s ass was sucking his soul out through his cock. Bucky’s whole body met the wall with vengeance as Steve drove into him for the final time, shoving his cock home right up against Bucky’s throbbing prostate.

Bucky was groaning along with Steve as he twitched through his climax, wild and nasty at the thought of having made Steve come- again. He didn’t think he’d ever get tired of wrecking Steve.

But he’d _promised_ himself.

He was panting in the aftermath, not yet aching and not yet satisfied, jerking and flexing around the steel rod of Steve’s cock, both pleased and dismayed by Steve’s orgasm, as Bucky was still anticipating his own release. He was about to beg to just to touch him, to bring him over while that hard length was still buried inside him when Steve pulled away, taking that glorious cock with him. Bucky whined deep in his throat as his legs came down, slightly stiff after remaining contorted for so long, but instead, Steve was setting him on the floor, positioning him on his hands and knees.

“This ain’t exactly the first time anymore,” Steve murmured, with a hint of smugness. He felt Steve petting and gently kneading his ass, likely reddened and slightly swollen from their vicious coupling, “So I hope it doesn’t make me a chump if I make this dame come like a freight train on all fours.”

Bucky felt his unfilled hole twitch and flutter- fuckin’ _hell_ Steve. He only managed a wrecked groan in response, arching back to press his ass into Steve’s large hands. He bent to brace himself on his elbows, unsure of Steve’s plans, but making it clear where he needed some attention. He’d work his own cock if he needed to, so long as Steve at least got those thick fingers back up in him.

“Shit, Bucky,” Steve moaned, and Bucky felt those wonderful fingers trailing through the mess of come and Vaseline around his hole and the backs of his thighs, “God, your hole, it’s…”

“It’s not fuckin’ getting any younger, you bastard,” Bucky rasped, voice well and truly wrecked from his incessant moaning and the earlier masterpiece of a suckjob, “The war’ll be over at this rate- _oh_!”

Oh. _Oh_. That wasn’t Steve’s fingers.

No, he moaned in delight, feeling the unmistakable press of Steve’s cock packing into him again. The shithead hadn’t even gone down after.

“Jesus Christ, maybe I’m starting to believe all this supersoldier business,” he gasped, thrilled as that implacable hardness filled him up again. Steve entered him slowly, letting up feel it as his body made way.

“Christ, look at you Bucky,” Steve groaned, ignoring or ignorant to the jibe, “You’re taking it all so good, Holy shit. Can’t believe you can take it all like this. _Seein’_ it…” He felt Steve’s thumbs pulling the globes of his ass farther apart as he pushed inside, as if Bucky’s wanton position hadn’t already presented him open and ready for it, “I never thought I’d see it, but you really need it don’t you? You need a hard cock up inside you, splitting you open to get you off, don’t you?”

He felt Steve’s hips meet his ass and he panted, just as desperate for it as Steve described, “Like you didn’t fuckin’ know, Rogers,” he grunted as Steve gave him a tiny, pointed thrust, “You josh me enough about it as it is. _Fuck_ ,” He gasped as Steve finally began to work into a proper, steady rhythm, slowly working them back toward the hysterical fucking they’d been at a minute ago, “Hell, don’t think I forgot how quick you were to get your fingers in me, th’ last time.”

Steve grunted back, gripping Bucky’s hip and shoulder, bending Bucky’s back further to pull him back on that cock, “You sure got a lot of words for someone who should be half way to comin’ on my cock by now. Ain’t I givin’ you what you wanted, Buck?”

“At least I’m not the crack shot who can’t even finish what he started.”

“You should be nicer to the guy who’s fuckin’ you twice tonight, Bucky.”

“Twice? From where I’m kneeling the first round ain’t over yet- _fuck_ , Steve, _right there_!”

Fuck, he was _so full_ \- the slight come down only enhanced the miracle of it. And Steve was hitting his sweet spot over and over each time. That and the mind fuck of Steve’s nonexistent refractory period had the pressure building again, behind his balls and his breastbone. It wasn’t hard to imagine that it was him – Bucky’s body. _Bucky_ \- and not Steve’s superhuman stamina that had his best friend worked up past the point of softening even after coming. His teeth and fingers were tingling with the onslaught of pleasure and fantasy. It was like Steve was built and made especially to fuck him so perfect. Giving him everything he’d never known he needed in a sexual partner- and he’d already wanted Steve as long as he’d know what it was to want anyone. Maybe he was still on the table and this was all just a wildly perfect hallucination. Maybe Bucky was already dead and this was his heaven?

And then fuck, _FUCK_ , Steve was slowing again, drawing his hands away from moving and controlling the sway of Bucky’s body. Scratch that. Maybe this was Bucky’s _hell_.

“ _Steve_ ,” He growled, hoping the obvious threat was apparent through his tone alone, because he there wasn’t enough blood left north of the border for his brain to come up with an adequate punishment for this.

Steve’s hands landed on his hips, gently directing Bucky to sit back on his cock, “Work back on it, Buck,” He insisted with his words and his fingers, “Show me how you like it. Show me what it takes to make you go off like a rocket with a big ol’ cock inside you.”

Well, fine. Steve could have it that way if he wanted.

But Bucky was fuckin’ taking this asshole down with him.

Bucky arched, rolling his body in a wave that he knew looked as good as it felt, flexing his ass around Steve’s cock like a whore before shoving himself backward to take Steve all the way to the hilt. He widened the brace of his knees for better leverage before thrusting himself back on it with a brutal rhythm, and he heard Steve curse as his own knees skidded against the wood floor. He felt the punch of that dick inside him, hitting him deep and he stayed there for a moment, twisting and grinding against Steve like a cat in fuckin’ heat, luxuriating in the pressure of Steve packed up inside him as deep as he could go. If only sixteen year old Bucky could see him now, taking what he wanted from Steve’s frankly ridiculous cock like a pro, and desperate for it. Bucky had figured out right out of the gate how he liked his sex, and he knew exactly how to get himself off on dick. And that was without this fuckin’ specimen to work with.

That was without _Steve_.

He’d gone off without a touch the first time he’d gotten Steve inside of him, and he considered it a herculean feat that he’d managed to last this long this go ‘round.

He’d fuckin’ _promised_ himself, goddamn it.

Spit open on Steve dick once again, he felt the pain of it again, but not from that cock.

This was going to be the last time. He swore on Eisenhower and Hitler and all the damn gods of this fuckin’ miserable war.

With that in mind, Bucky let all other thoughts go, consumed with the task of working his ass without mercy, determined to get himself off and fuckin’ hell if Steve wasn’t going to come again before it happened, so help him.

This was the _last goddamn time_ he’d let himself be this weak for it.

He flattened his chest to the floor and _went for it_.

Nothing else breached his singlemindedness except for the rod of heat in his ass and the wrecked sounds Steve made above him. Bucky knew every move and shake to get a man off in his ass and he employed every single move in his repertoire, panting and gasping and clenching for it. He could be Steve’s whore- _hell_ , he could be Steve’s Peggy Carter, working himself on his cock like a damn wet and moaning for it.

“Give it to me, Steve,” He panted, arching and tightening for the show if it. He was at the point of no return. A few tugs and he’d be finished, so it was now or never, “Need another load of that superhuman come in my ass to get me off. Don’t tell me you haven’t got in in ya.”

“Bucky, Jesus…”

“You like th’ feel of it right? Wetting me up and fuckin’ your come into me,” He writhed and moaned for it, staggering to his elbows again and throwing his head back until he felt the brush of his hair between his straining shoulder blades, “Pin me down and make me take it, Captain. Fuck me like you’re gonna fuckin’ _breed me_.”

“Oh, _oh, fuck_ ,” Steve gasped, voice strangled as he fell forward, Bucky reveling in the thud of Steve’s hands slamming into the floor as he began to slam into Bucky’s ass. His pounding rhythm grew frantic again, and Bucky hurriedly slipped and hand underneath to pull desperately at his own cock, slicked with the remained of Vaseline and Steve’s come dripping down his balls, “Fuck, _fuck_ , Bucky, FUCK!”

Steve came forcefully inside him for the second time that night, and Bucky knew he would be truly dripping with it, his ass running over with the hot, sticky release. His muscles contacted around Steve’s length as he came, seconds after Steve began jerking inside him, making incoherent sounds of pleasure.

Bucky groaned, milking himself through it, and doing the same to Steve, who’s orgasm seemed impossibly longer than the first, thrusting languidly against the spasming heat of Bucky’s ass around him.

And then it was over, and Steve was collapsing, sending them both to the unforgiving wood floor in the rumpled pile of sweaty, sticky limbs.

“ _Fuck_ , you’re fat now,” Bucky moaned, crushed under Steve’s weight.

He felt Steve giggle breathlessly against him, “Well, this tub of lard just fucked you through the floor, so quit your complainin’.”

“Wasn’t complainin’,” Bucky grouched, and truly, he loved having Steve’s implacable bulk against him, holding him down like a big, muscle-y security blanket. If it were up to him, they’d stay just like this for fuckin’ ever. But this was the last time, “’Cept your cock is still shoved up the back door, and it ain’t so fun now that the show’s over.”

“Crap, sorry,” Steve mumbled before hauling himself up and off. He pulled out a little too quick than was comfortable, but that was fine. Bucky needed to start distancing his fucked out afterglow from this before his willpower fizzled out with what was left of his brain cells.

Once Steve was off him he made to rise as well, only to find himself suddenly lifted and bundled into Steve’s ridiculously muscular arms as his friend fuckin’ carried him to their bed as a wrung-out heap of limbs.

That was not helping with the whole distancing tactic, Steven. Sheesh.

Before Steve could fuckin’ make to tuck him the fuck in or some shit, Bucky wormed his own way under the sheets, “Nuff with the coddling, Rogers. I can take care of myself here.”

“Yeah, I figured that out at some point,” Steve shot back, “Do you need to, I dunno… clean up or something? You’re… we’re kind of a mess,” He glanced down at his spent cock, spattered with the remains of come and lube.

“I’m fuckin’ kosher, Steve. You can go spit shine your dick if you want, I’m going the fuck back to sleep.”

He rolled over as Steve retreated outside, facing away from the door. He could feel where his ass still wouldn’t close up after that fantastically thorough fucking and focused on the ache and absolutely nothing else until sleep finally took him under.

His head was quiet. His dreams were quiet.

This was the last time. He swore it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Only proofread once because I was impatient about posting. I'll go back over it later.
> 
> Again, con crit would be appreciated. Final porn-tastic installment will be up in all it's debauched glory next week.


	3. back it up, show it off: Modern Steve/Bucky

Bucky was driving Steve insane. Certifiably, institutionally, criminally insane.

Steve had been gone on Bucky since he’d wrested Steve’s virginity from him seventy short years ago. He’d wanted him as a wiry adolescent letting Steve fuck him in their sad little tenement, as a hardened, agonized GI when he’d begged for Steve to take him in that lonely, quiet cottage, and as this. This thick, tired, maddening version of Bucky who had embraced their new modern world in beautiful and often vexing ways. Bucky’d always been muscular- as a teen and a soldier- but Bucky _now_ was absolutely stacked with muscle everywhere, so similar and yet so different from Steve himself, thanks to his own dosage of serum.

But the Bucky of old had never been allowed to wear anything like the clothes men could and would wear in the 21st century.

Bucky had been unashamedly, unabashedly queer - _gay_ – almost as far back as Steve could remember. One of his clearest, earliest memories was of Bucky confessing himself and his deepest, darkest secrets to Steve on the very cusp of their adolescence. Bucky had been enthusiastic, if necessarily covert, about diving into his queer desires throughout their teenage years, and Steve had been by his side for every dip and turn of that wild ride, supporting if not understanding Bucky’s flagrant queerness in circles where he’d been permitted to express that side of himself.

Queer – _gay_ – men, and women, too, Steve supposed, in 2015 were permitted to express themselves in a literal rainbow of new and terrifying ways. Not terrifying in ways that were repulsive or even off-putting. No, Steve was thrilled about all the ways in which the last century had inched oppressed people toward the acceptance and freedom they’d been violently denied in his time.

Bucky, however, being thrilled about these developments- that was proving to be the terrifying part.

Bucky frequenting gay clubs and parties every weekend. Bucky embracing the technology that allowed for uncomplicated dates and _other things_ with other queer fellas – Steve dearly wished he’d never dared ask about the mysteries of Grindr. Bucky getting to dress like a lady and getting applause for it instead of potenial ridicule. Bucky’s fucking _boyfriend_ of all things- French, the man was fucking _French_. And a _dancer_. These things were driving Steve to metaphorically- or literally if Thor happened to be around- drink.

Bucky in short shorts (“they’re Daisy Dukes, Steven, geez, watch a little television every once and a while”) and a loose, thin tank tops. _That_ was Steve’s current problem and source of his rapidly encroaching insanity.

Like Bucky currently leaning against Steve’s kitchen island drinking coffee and reading the newspaper on one of Stark’s ubiquitous tablet computers, thick thighs and ass wrapped up sinfully in those jean cutoffs that barely covered the muscular, _plentiful_ globes of his ass. The sleeveless t-shirt of the day was black and loose around his broad shoulders and waist, emblazoned with the single word “PARTY” in bright fluorescent orange text. Steve had an inkling that it might be a reference to something, but if it was, it was certainly too subtle and flew over Steve’s head.

Steve practically lived with a semi whenever Bucky made himself at home in Steve’s apartment, typically the a morning after a Friday or Saturday night of parties and depravity when there was little to no Avengers business to attend to.

Since Bucky was here now, Steve had to assume Julien either hadn’t spent the night or had left early.

Bucky glanced up, having finally decided to acknowledge Steve’s entrance- he would never dare to think Bucky hadn’t noticed his arrival as it happened. Bucky noticed _everything_. And that was dangerous in itself, especially when early morning Steve was having a difficult time tamping down his unbearable attraction to this man.

Bucky brushed his almost shoulder length hair behind his ear, “No run with Wilson this morning?”

Steve shook his head, making his way toward the coffee maker Bucky had graciously prepared with enough brew to share, “Movie night went pretty late.”

His friend just snorted, which Steve knew was Bucky’s derisive way of conveying ‘if I can be up at this hour after not getting in until approximately dawn, Sam can suck it’, and set his tablet down, turning to where Steve was doctoring his own cup.

“So, plans for today?” Steve asked with forced nonchalance, “Will you be going out again tonight or can we finally finish watching that show?”

Bucky smiled delightedly, “Didn’t realize you’d gotten so invested. Yeah, we can watch some more of it- you realize we’re only on season three though, right? There’s like, five more after this one.”

Steve groaned and let his head thunk down on the cool granite of his counter.

“Oh shut up,” Bucky laughed, “You know you love it. I know you’re pulling for Raven, you whore. You think this season was catty just wait until you meet-“  
  
“Don’t you dare spoil anything, jerk,” Steve snapped playfully and pushed Bucky’s tablet off the counter with a bit more force than was necessary. It just caused Bucky to laugh harder. Steve wished he could say he’d done it for the sake of their playful argument, but as Bucky bent over to retrieve his fallen computer, Steve knew that was a big, fat, round, firm lie.

\--

They decided to squeeze in a sparring workout before reinitiating their marathon of drag queens and cat fights. They tramped down together toward the tower gymnasium, Steve deflecting all of Bucky’s teasing attempts to spoil future episodes for him (though the internet had already spilled some things, and he knew Raja would be crowned in a few episodes). Steve knew Bucky really did appreciate Steve’s interest in the campy reality show, just another small way he’d continued to casually offer his support for Bucky’s campy lifestyle.

And at least the promise of working up a good sweat would get Bucky out of those horrible (amazing) shorts. Though the snug yoga pants he’d traded them for were hardly an improvement.

And low and behold, their frantic grappling for dominance on the mats felt like just another way Steve was covertly objectifying his friend.

It was a shame, Steve thought has he pinned Bucky with a sloppy chokehold, his chest to the former assassin’s back and his hips mashed up against Bucky’s ass, that Bucky’s interest in him had only ever extended itself toward awkward teenage favors and a desperate wartime dalliance. The way his own thighs bracketed Bucky’s only led credence to the fantasy that their intense sparring matches would have made for some truly excellent foreplay.

It wouldn’t have taken much. He could have just tugged Bucky’s waistband down to expose him perfectly. Bucky would have been wearing one of those remarkable toys that held him open and ready for Steve to just slip his dick inside, all set to pound Bucky into the mats.

He could still hear echoes of the way Bucky would beg and groan for it, desperate to fucked and filled up by Steve’s cock.

And now Steve was feeling sweaty, hot, and worked up for a whole different reason.

He rolled off Bucky promptly.

“I think that’s more than enough for me today,” He groaned, pretending for all he was worth that it was their workout that had him sounding so worn out and wrecked. It really did take it out of him, attempting to best Bucky in mock-battle, and even then, Bucky had decades of experience and a ruthless streak on his side, coming out on top in their fights more often than not.

Not that Steve would ever complain about Bucky straddling his waist in victory, pressing that tantalizing ass against Steve’s hips, pinning his wrists in place with all the power contained in those thick, flexing biceps.

Fuck.

Bucky cast him a cagey side eye as he rose from his supplicant place on the mat, but agreed readily enough for Steve’s conscience.

\--

Steve was up to something.

Sure, things had seemed normal all morning, for the most part. But Bucky considered himself a pretty perceptive sonuvabitch, and he could sense the tension around Steve like a fog since his friend had first wandered into the kitchen that morning. Bucky wondered for a moment if this was another thing of Steve’s about… He _knew_ Steve didn’t trust his boyfriend (and Christ, that _still_ sounded weird, even in his head). But Julien had headed back to his own place on the Upper East Side to pack for a work-related trip early that morning, long before Bucky had made his way to Steve’s, so he couldn’t think of any reason Steve’s panties could have gotten in a twist about _that_.

And then there was Steve’s behavior while they were sparring.

He’d considered it briefly as he tore off this workout wear in Steve’s bathroom, showering before pulling his regular clothes back on. On the surface, it had been like any other spar- even if Steve _had_ managed to take him down for once. Less superficially though, he could have sworn he’d felt Steve chub up a bit there, at the end, when he’d had Bucky nailed to the sparring mat. Which, okay, fine, that shit happened sometimes where you got all up in someone else’s space like one did when you were entwined Greco-Roman style.

But between that and the _looks_ Steve had been tossing at Bucky’s chosen outfit- looks he probably thought Bucky hadn’t been wise to, the _rube_ \- Bucky was suspicious.

Fuck Steve; Bucky loved his clothes. He looked fuckin’ great and Steve could piss off if he secretly didn’t approve of Bucky being the big, flamboyant faggot he was.

Cuz yeah, Bucky liked dolling himself up like one of the twinks in those pornos and cruising the clubs, eyes smeared with black and clothes that reveal everything without showing anything. He liked trolling for dick on the hook up apps and getting railed in all sorts of interesting places and positons, without any of the dangers of surreptitious queer sex of the thirties. He liked watching RuPaul and the other queens camp it up on national TV and really feel like he had a place in this crazy new world they’d found themselves in. And fuck, he loved getting to wear whatever the hell he wanted without having to worry about some schmuck on the street calling him a fairy and getting whacked in a back alley.

Sure, there were still assholes who wanted to call him out and try and make him feel shitty about himself and his life, but what the hell did they know. As far as Bucky was concerned, he’d earned the right to be a hot fucking mess and _lived_ for it. He could kick any of those douchebags’ asses to Jersey and back, so the joke was on them, really.

And now there was this.

“I just don’t know how it’s they do it,” Steve was saying as they watched the final three queens struct down the catwalk, presenting themselves for the panel of judges, “I mean, how do you not break an ankle in those?”

“Dames do it all the time and you don’t blink an eye,” Bucky shot back, not all that focused on the events playing out on screen- he’d seen it all before (hell, he’s even _met_ some of these ladyboys in his time on the circuit since coming back) and was more interested in Steve’s reactions anyway, “Potts wears stilettos to the office _every day_.”

“Are you trying to call me prejudiced again?” Steve asked, obviously gearing up for a fight.

“Naw,” Bucky insisted, “Just pointing out the double standard. It’s all about balance, adjusting your center of gravity. Nothin’ to it, really.”

Steve frowned, glancing back at the show, “How’d you learn?”

Bucky snorted, “Trial and lots of error. Honestly, the serum helped with that a bit. My ankles can take a lot of abuse these days.”

“Could you,” Steve paused, looking down at the carpet for a second before meeting Bucky’s eye, “Could you show me?”

He couldn’t hold in the laugh if he tried, Steve’s just so ridiculous sometimes, “You want me to give my lady a call?”

“You don’t gotta get all done up or nothin’,” Steve insisted, sounding oddly earnest, “Just the shoes.”

Well, Bucky couldn’t see a reason why not. It’s not like he hadn’t figured out Steve knew the outcome of the season hours ago.

He scooted out to his smaller, temporary apartment across the hall, slipping on a simple pair of black pumps with a frankly ludicrously high heel, just to show off.

He’d just strutted back into Steve’s living room when he figured it out, like a shock to his spinal column.

The way Steve’s eye had snapped, not to the heels or the ankles he’d been so apparently concerned about a moment ago, but to Bucky’s _legs_ , sliding with little subtlety up and landing squarely on Bucky’s (phenomenal, _thank_ _you_ ) ass. Bucky has a lifetime of investment in knowing exactly when and how to recognize when a fella is eyeing him up, and Steve was checking every damn box.

He had been _all day_.

Hell, he probably pushed that tablet off the counter just to get an eyeful, the punk. Bucky was almost ashamed he hadn’t caught onto Steve’s game earlier. He doesn’t even let Steve blink before he’d planted his feet in a distinctly unladylike manner and crossed his arms across his chest in an unconsciously protective fashion. He couldn’t help the nasty glare and was inordinately pleased when Steve caught his eye and paled gratifyingly.

\--

“You want to fuck me.”

Steve flushed immediately at Bucky’s abrupt declaration, sputtering in an _extremely_ unbecoming way, especially for Captain goddamn America, suddenly absolutely unable to meet Bucky’s eyes. That hadn’t sounded like a question and it _certainly_ hadn’t sounded like an offer.

“What? Bucky, _no_ -“

“Bucky, _yes_ ,” His friend snapped back, obviously pissed as hell, “I can’t fuckin’ _believe_ you.”

“Just, wait a minute, _please_ -“

“You must think you’re so fuckin’ sneaky, huh?”

“ _No_.”

“Could have just _said_ somethin’, you big palooka.”

“Bucky, I’m sorr- What?”

Bucky rolled his eyes, “You. Could. Have. Said. Something.”

“But…” Steve rubbed his hands over his face, giving up on attempting to pass off his blatant ogling as anything other than what it was, “Why? Why would I _ever_ do that?”

“I’m about as queer as a three dollar bill, Steve, and I’m easy- what do you think would’ve happened? I probably would have said _yes_ , you idiot.”

Steve mind short circuited for a moment, rendering him completely incapable of responding to… to _that_ idea and all of the unpacking it so obviously needed.

Bucky continued as if Steve wasn’t having an aneurysm, “I think I’m offended. What, you didn’t think I was queer enough to take my _extremely_ well hung BFF up on a roll in the hay? I know my brain is little more than swiss cheese these days, but I think it would have taken more than a bit of brainwashin’ for me to forget a cock like that, Steve. It’s like you don’t even know me,” Bucky paused, seemingly finally registering Steve’s minor fugue state, “Steve? You havin’ a stroke or somethin’? Blink twice if you can hear me.”

“I didn’t…” Steve struggled to find words, “I didn’t even know if you remembered we… You never said anything.”

“It ain’t exactly polite dinner conversation, I’ll give you that,” Bucky admitted, “But yeah, I remember.”

Steve finally stood, striding toward the large tower window looking out over the jagged peaks of Manhattan, “If you would’ve… said yes, how come _you_ never said anything?”

He heard Bucky scoff like Steve was being the difficult one here, which was insulting, “No reason to bark up that tree. I haven’t exactly been hard up for it these days. ‘Specially with our history, even talking about it is probably a bad idea.”

And wasn’t that just the first rational statement to come out of his mouth this whole surreal conversation.

“You’re damn right it’s a bad idea, Buck. What about… what about your _boyfriend_?” He turned back around, needing to gauge his reaction to the pointed question.

Bucky scowled and looked away, wetting his lips, “Like Julien doesn’t have a piece of ass in half the cities he goes to. I ain’t stupid, Steve.”

“And that doesn’t bother you?”

Bucky’s frown deepened and he finally looked back at Steve, “Yeah, it fuckin’ kills me, alright? But that doesn’t matter. What _does_ is that I don’t owe my boyfriend anything, okay? If we were to fuck its none of his goddamn business.”

“If he’s treating you this way, why are you even _with_ him?”

“I don’t want to talk about my relationship problems, Steve. Frankly, it’s none of _your_ business either, so butt the fuck out,” Bucky finally dropped his arms and began striding toward Steve with purpose, the towering heels accentuating the cut and curves of his legs in ways that had Steve’s mouth watering and eyes wandering, “Now, don’t try and bullshit me here. I can see the way you’re lookin’ clear as day. That part ain’t in question. Do you want to do this or not, Steve?”

“Yes- _Yeah_ , I want to, Bucky, geez. I mean, look at you.”

“Yeah, I’ve done okay for myself,” Bucky smirked as he wound his arms around Steve’s neck and shoulders, “You want me to turn the camo on?” He asked nudging his left arm against Steve gently.

The arm. He thought Steve didn’t want to look at his metal arm. Like any part of Bucky was a part of him Steve didn’t want his hands and mouth all over.

“No, Bucky, _Christ_ -“ He was cut off by Bucky yanking him forward and sliding his tongue in his mouth like it belonged there.

Steve couldn’t restrain his immediate moan, loud and embarrassing, drowning out the faint sounds of Drag Race elsewhere in the room. His hands dove in without hesitation, gripping Bucky’s ass firmly, worming is fingers up under the frayed hem of Bucky’s indecent shorts to dig into the supple skin underneath. He heard Bucky’s answering chuckle and breathy groan of _yeah, I thought so_ , in between their lips as he tugged Steve closer, pulling them flush together and wrapping one long, muscular leg around Steve’s thigh. Even pressed together and on one leg, Bucky’s balance in those absurd heels was impeccable. He was just slightly taller than Steve in them, necessitating Steve tipping his chin up to reach his lips comfortably, and it was so slightly reminiscent of their first fraught sexual encounter that it took Steve’s breath away.

He continued to knead Bucky’s ass as his friend began to hump his hips gently but insistently against Steve’s, drawing attention to his hardening erection, solid and apparent even through two layers of denim. Steve couldn’t believe this was even happening, like something out of his frequent and shameful fantasies. How many times had he bourn witness to Bucky’s never ending strings of one night stands and artful cruising for dick since they’d both come back to life this century? He’d seen Bucky wrapped around more men than he could even recall and now he was wrapped around _Steve_ \- not a pity fuck or ounce of delirious desperation in sight. They were going to fuck; no holes bared, no complications or caveats to speak of. Just the two of them finally in the right place at the right time, wanting each other.

The more he thought about it, the more turned on it got him, and he knew without a touch or look that he was at full mast in his own jeans. Taking a firm hold on Bucky’s hips, he drug his friend forward to grind his dick against Bucky’s rock hard thigh.

“Oh yeah,” Bucky gasped, “There he is,” Bucky’s hands unwound from his shoulders, shoving down to paw at Steve’s fly without hesitation, “You’re wearing way too many clothes; let’s get this guy some air, shall we?”

Less than a heartbeat later, the restrictive pressure at Steve’s crotch was abating and he felt Bucky’s large hand brush over his straining length still encased in his briefs. His hips punched forward with a mind of their own, chasing that touch. That seemed to be what it took to destabilize Bucky’s perch on his heels, and he felt the shift in weight as Bucky staggered slightly back, but before his friend could catch himself, Steve slid his hands down to the taut skin of Bucky’s thighs and lifted.

Without missing a beat, Bucky swung his body up with Steve’s grip, wrapping those fantastic gams around Steve’s waist like pieces of a dirty puzzle. His legs twitched briefly, and Steve heard the twin thunks of Bucky’s heels as they met the ground. Bucky’s lips had migrated, nipping and biting down Steve’s throat and mouthing at his pulse, while one of his hands still teased Steve’s cock between them, leaving his other to grip Steve’s flank in his effort to keep himself aloft. This left Steve with the task of baring most of Bucky’s weight on his own, which was hardly a problem. His hands gripped and slid along the thick muscle of Bucky’s thighs, mapping the planes he’d been so caught up on greedily. They eventually found their way back to the delicious meat of Bucky’s ass and hitched him up just high enough to dislodge Bucky’s own eager hand on his dick, but allowing it to graze Bucky’s ass in compensation. His fingers dug in, pulling Bucky tighter against him, wanting to feel the globes of that ass against his cock.

Those shorts were so tightly molded to Bucky’s body that there was room for Steve’s dick to slide down the rivulet between his cheeks, nearly fucking Bucky’s crease desperately. Bucky moaned again, baring down against Steve’s cock.

“What do you say we get this show on the road,” Bucky growled, and Steve felt every delicate inch of Bucky’s long, luxurious flex against him, in his hands, across his chest, and against his cock. Bucky’s own dick was a hard bulge pressing against Steve’s abs.

Steve agreed with every ounce of enthusiasm contained within him, and stepped forward to take this to the bedroom.

Only to stumble gracelessly to his knees as he tripped over one of those infernal shoes.

Bucky laughed brightly at Steve’s rare show of clumsiness, not even pausing before shifting his weight back to bring them both horizontal.

“You know what, this works, too,” He chuckled as he tugged Steve’s jeans down his thighs as far as he could reach. Steve didn’t wait a moment before shucking them and his shirt completely, leaving him in just his underwear. Bucky hummed in what sounded like approval, trailing a metal finger down Steve’s chest and fingering his abdominals, “Christ, do you have any idea how you look, Steve? S’like you’re carved from fucking marble.”

Last time Steve had had Bucky under his fingers, he’d been basically fully clothed.

“Now who’s wearing too many clothes?” Steve grumbled, fingering the bottom of Bucky’s flamboyant tank suggestively, to which Bucky just chuckled again before gripping the hem and tugging it up and off, baring his strong shoulders and chiseled torso. This also fully uncovered the extensive scarring framing Bucky’s metal graft, which had Steve’s heart thudding in both longing and remembered angst.

“Better, Rogers?” Bucky murmured, only looking slightly self-conscious under Steve’s gaze, despite the fact that they both knew it was nothing Steve hadn’t seen before in the course of their reunion and its aftermath.

“Fucking hell, Bucky,” Steve groaned in response, diving forward to mouth the generous mounds of Bucky’s pecs, hoping his eagerness would quell any of Bucky’s lingering doubts about what his body was doing to Steve.

He spent a great deal of time working over Bucky’s collarbones, nipping and sucking blood bruises into the unblemished skin, doing his best not to think about any marks left there earlier that would have long faded by now. He only felt a twinge of guilt about cuckholding Bucky’s lover like this before shoving it violently away. If that bastard didn’t know how good he had it, Steve wouldn’t feel any shame about giving Bucky what he wanted. Memories of his first time exploring Bucky’s body had him homing in on Bucky’s dusky nipples, biting and sucking ruthlessly to the chorus of Bucky’s grunts and whines as he worked them over. Bucky’d been so sensitive to touch here before, and Steve wanted nothing more than to have Bucky writhing beneath him, consumed in pleasure and forgetting his boyfriend even existed in the wake of it. While he attended to one nipple with his mouth, he kept the other warm by kneading and fondling Bucky’s other pectoral in one large hand as the other inched down toward Bucky’s waistband, tracing the hard lines and furoughs of Bucky’s thick waist as he did so.

He felt it when Bucky drew his legs up, curling them over Steve’s thighs to draw Steve closer. Bucky’s fingers dug into the muscle of Steve shoulders, twitching and spasming with every nip and suck of Steve’s lips. Steve looked forward to the short time in which those marks would decorate his skin when they were through, as there would surely be bruising left in the wake of Bucky’s strong grip. The points of his metal fingers broke skin as Steve’s hand groped the bulge of Bucky’s heavy cock still trapped within his cutoffs.

“Steve,” Bucky whined, low and needy, and Steve couldn’t help but glance up to get an eyeful of the wrecked look screwing up Bucky’s striking features, eyes wrenched shut and kiss swollen mouth parted and pink around Bucky’s panting breaths.

“Off. _Off_ ,” Steve growled, ripping open Bucky’s fly with little finesse, dislodging the button violently and sending it flying off to who knows where. He felt only a little shamefaced when his fervor wrenched Bucky’s zipper apart, tearing through the fabric below in his haste to get Bucky fully exposed.

It didn’t take much, since Bucky wasn’t wearing anything underneath. Good Lord, Bucky.

And there was the ruddy, engorged length of him, bared for Steve’s gaze. Bucky’s cock was flushed with blood and twitching with arousal, dusted with coarse, dark hair.

“Don’t remember it being this big, before,” He commented idly, reaching out to feel for himself the hot, hard rod of Bucky’s erection.

He felt Bucky’s glare before he looked up to see it for himself, “Yeah, well, _serum_ ,” Bucky grumbled, arching his hips into Steve’s touch, “And it’s not like you ever paid it much attention, those times.”

Steve had a brief moment of shame, thinking back to recall that no, he hadn’t spared much attention to Bucky’s cock in their previous encounters, having been quite a bit preoccupied by, well, the everything else his friend had been offering.

“It’s not like I heard you complaining,” He shot back, taking his time to stroke and attend to Bucky’s gorgeous dick _now_ , “You were pretty focused on getting a dick in you, if I recall. Can’t blame a guy for getting distracted, under the circumstances.”

“I can and most certainly _do_ blame a fella when he gets distracted, thank you,” Bucky murmured, voice only slightly breathy and cracked as Steve handled his dick, “You’re lucky I liked you enough to let you off the hook, or we’d’ve had words.”

“I’ll keep that in mind,” Steve chuckled, turning his attention back to the hand encircling Bucky, watching raptly as the red, swollen length of him slid between his fingers, slicked by the copious pre-come he was leaking. How had he never taken the time to notice how beautiful this part of him was? It seemed like a crime, looking back on it. It was thick, though not as thick as Steve own, though just as long, as far as Steve could gauge it- steel and blood encased in velvety skin, the tip nearly purple with how aroused Bucky was. It made Steve feel so powerful, to have that effect on his friend. He swiped a thumb over the head, feeling the slight give of the glans as he played with it, paying particular attention to the leaking tip.

“Oh, fuck, _Steve_ ,” Bucky groaned, and Steve heard what must have been his skull hitting the plush carpeting of the floor as Bucky tossed his head back in the throes of it.

Encouraged by Bucky’s increasingly inspiring reactions, Steve ventured farther back, feeling out Bucky’s heavy sack, scrotum large and swollen like his erection. His balls were warm and soft in Steve’s hand as he fondled them, rolling them gently between his fingers and savoring Bucky’s breathy moans. He cupped them in his palm, which had the added effect of dragging the tip of his middle finger over the puckered, tight skin of Bucky’s hole, which had Bucky arching and crying out beneath him. The rim twitched and fluttered with need where he grazed it, which sent hot, sizzling lines of arousal singing down Steve’s spine, his body viscerally recalling what it felt like to be buried in the heat of Bucky’s body.

It felt different from how Steve remembered it, though in fairness, Steve had only ever played with Bucky’s ass when it had been either freshly fucked or slick and loosened from Bucky’s own preparations. Feeling the tense, relatively dry skin now, he marveled at it. That it was even possible to get the substantial girth of a cock up inside Bucky’s small, tight entrance. His own cock twitched in anticipation of ruining Bucky’s ass, loosening it with his fingers and spreading it out until that furled skin was smooth and taut around Steve’s cock.

“You got any slick?” Bucky asked, as if reading Steve’s dirty mind. His legs tightened about Steve where he remained encased between them, the hard muscle firm and unrelenting around him.

“Yeah, over- over by the couch,” Steve confirmed as he withdrew is hand to spread Bucky’s thighs and escape their hold.

“What, you whack it while watching porn in your living room, Steve?” Bucky needled as Steve traversed the room as quickly as he was able with a raging, insistent hard on. The slippery bottle was wedged behind the cushions of his couch when he found it.

“Yeah, what of it?” He shot back as he turned, “It’s high definition.”

All the breath wheezed from his lungs as he took in the sight of Bucky spread out on the carpeting. He’d removed those terrible, wonderful shorts at long last, leaving him completely bare for Steve ardent gaze, thighs parted obscenely, waiting for Steve to fill the space between them. Arms, metal and flesh, flung up over his head as he laid himself out, miles and miles of creamy, toned skin and muscle and chrome stretched out for Steve to lose himself in.

Bucky grinned when he caught sight of Steve’s prize, “Oh good. I was worried you still used petrol jelly.”

“Turn over,” Steve groaned as he made short work of the distance between them, dodging the flail of Bucky’s long legs as he did as he was asked. He positioned himself with his forearms braced against the carpet, back bowed toward the flooring as his knees went under him to arch his ass back toward Steve’s waiting hands. He first gripped Bucky’s waist, holding them both still as he took in the long, carved lines of Bucky’s back, and the matching scarring from his prosthetic. His thick, chestnut hair fanned over his shoulder blades before being tossed aside as Bucky turned to glance back at him, arching an expressive brow that clearly conveyed, _Well, I’m here. Now what, genius?_

Steve just needed to breathe for a second, okay?

It took him a moment, but he eventually garnered the courage to move his gaze down.

Bucky’s ass, just as bountiful and round as he remembered it, spread out on the floor of that cottage, was spread for him now, the cleft parted by the lewd sprawl of Bucky’s thighs, exposing his hole in all its pink glory. Bucky was completely hairless here, and Steve didn’t doubt for a second that Bucky shaved it that way, making the skin down there as smooth and unblemished as the full globes of his perfect fucking ass.

“Not that I don’t appreciate that just one look after all this time has rendered your mouthy ass speechless,” Bucky drawled, “But this ain’t a museum, champ.” _Touch me._

Far be it from Steve to argue with that logic.

He went straight for two, luscious handful, grabbing at Bucky’s rear with fervor, pulling them apart to get a full view of him spread out, the stretch tugging the edges of his rim apart with promise. Pushing them together to get a look at some prime cleavage as his full cheeks pressed against each other, smooth and supple in Steve’s hands. Bucky pressed back into his firm grip, dimpling the muscle above his ass and digging Steve’s fingers in roughly. Bucky was relatively pliant under his hands, letting the muscle relax and give, making it even more plush and soft where Steve groped him.

“Knew you liked it,” Bucky laughed breathily, groaning as Steve’s large hands felt him up, “You were quick enough it get your fingers in that first time, I shoulda known.”

“God, what’s not to like?” Steve groaned, kneading the muscle lustily, reveling in the shape and feel of him, “You have an ass that would make angels weep.”

“Never knew you were so fuckin’ sappy though,” Bucky laughed outright, “C’mon, Steve. Show me how you want me to take it. Show me how much you love this,” He thrust his ass back aggressively, “You haven’t been exactly shy about lookin’, or getting me into fuck me pumps. Own up to it.”

“As if that isn’t why you wear those goddamn shorts all the fuckin’ time,” Steve countered, following Bucky instruction despite his words, swiping his hands inward to get in the crack of his ass and dragging his thumbs down the cleft from tailbone to taint, “You _want_ people to look.”

“Like I’d deprive the world of this view,” Bucky snarked, “It’s one of my finest _ass_ ets, after all.”

Steve groaned from something other than lust this time, “ _Really_ , Bucky?”

“You ain’t a delicate flower no more, Rogers,” Bucky ribbed, “You’re getting the unabridged Bucky Barnes experience this time around, jokes and all, whether you like it or not. Sex is supposed to be _fun_. Just go for the gold; I’ll tell ya if there’s somethin’ I don’t like.”

Well, thanks in part to Tony Stark’s _unique_ primer on the wonders of the twenty first century, Steve had plenty of ideas.

He used his thumbs to part Bucky’s cheeks, sucking in a harsh breath when that pink hole winked at him lewdly.

“Christ, Bucky, you want this to be over before it starts? Knock it off.”

Bucky snickered and clenched again.

“Fuck,” Steve growled before deciding to shut Bucky up once and for all.

“ _Oh_ , Steve, God. What are you-?” Bucky groaned, glancing back again as if he couldn’t believe it.

Steve just grinned from between those juicy mounds and swiped his tongue over Bucky’s hole again, wetting him up.

“What, no one’s ever done this to you before, Barnes?”

“Don’t be an idiot, Steve,” Bucky moaned, dropping his head onto his forearms, “Had my ass eaten out by half the tops in this damn city. Never thought _you’d_ think of it though.”

“Maybe you should quit underestimating me, jerk.”

“Then _prove_ it, punk.”

Bucky always knew Steve had a weakness for a challenge.

Granted, Steve had never _done_ this to anyone before- though he’d _fantasized_ often enough as of late. Still, there was only so much instruction one could glean from porn of all places. That didn’t mean Steve would go for anything less than whole hog though. He licked steadily around Bucky’s rim, getting the skin as moist and slick as he could while taking brief pauses to tongue the rim itself, tugging gently and loosening the pucker as he went. He felt drunk on the taste of Bucky, musky and dark in this private (or as private as Bucky kept it) area. He felt the wrinkled twist of muscle against his tongue twitch and flutter with every hard pass, accompanied by Bucky’s wrecked moans and pants.

“Shove it in,” Bucky gasped, arching his hips back until Steve was nearly smothered by his ass, “Just shove it the fuck _in_. Stop fucking teasing.”

Contrarily, Steve continued to tease Bucky’s hole, wanting to be as thorough about their preparations as possible. The rim already felt a great deal more pliant than it had a minute ago, going loose and soft under Steve’s lips, though still tight enough to discourage any penetrative movements. That wasn’t to say Steve didn’t want it though. He wanted it _desperately_. To taste Bucky in his deepest, darkest place, and consume him from the inside out. He pulled Bucky’s ass wider, making more room for his mouth in the tight space that was already messy and slick with his spit. He covered the hole with his mouth and _sucked_.

Bucky groaned, wild and wanton, but seemed to have run out of patience, “Alright, asshole, you asked for it,” He growled throatily before shoving Steve briskly back with a foot planted to his sternum. Steve didn’t even have a moment to catch his breath before Bucky resumed their previous grappling and had Steve on his back within seconds, “Open your goddamn mouth. Lots of tongue, you bastard.”

And then Bucky was straddling his face, thick, beautiful thighs bracketing his ears and muffling the sounds of his apartment. Steve watched in stunned fascination as Bucky gripped and parted his own cheeks and lowered his ass onto Steve’s mouth, rubbing his supple hole over Steve’s lips hintingly.

“Get to work, Rogers.”

Bucky began to grind, not waiting a beat for Steve to get with the program.

Steve got there pretty quick though.

The harsh slap of Steve’s palms meeting Bucky’s ass reverberated obscenely throughout the room and Bucky whimpered, pressing back into the brutal touch, “Yeah, _yeah_.”

Steve’s blood was singing in his veins and he did it again, bringing a palm harshly down on Bucky’s flexing ass, the sound adding to the glorious cacophony of his heartbeat thudding in his ears where the meat of Bucky’s thighs were pressed against them. He used the other to hold Bucky open for his mouth and tongue to lave nasty, hot stripes over his fluttering hole and finally begin a teasing press inside that tight heat. With Bucky’s hand now free, he felt his friend reach down to cup is own cock and balls, holding them off Steve’s forehead where he had been leaking pre-come like a goddamn faucet into Steve’s hair. When the point of Steve’s tongue finally dove past his rim, Bucky moaned like a whore, and his whole body, including that tight furl of skin abruptly loosened. Steve took the prime opportunity to really dig his fingers in and savor the soft, titillating curves of Bucky’s glutes and hips. The reprieve only lasted a moment before Bucky started howling obscenities and grinding back down against Steve’s exploring tongue, trying get as much of the wet intrusion inside as possible.

He wished he could voice all of his dirty thoughts, about how absolutely phenomenal Bucky’s plush ass felt in his hands, how dirtywrongright Bucky tasted under his mouth, how he couldn’t wait to bury his cock inside Bucky’s hot body and defile his hole until Bucky couldn’t close himself up afterwards, how he wanted to feel the blistering spatter of Bucky’s come on his chest when Bucky got off on the weight and stretch of Steve’s dick stuffed up inside him. How he wanted to come inside Bucky over and over until he was _dripping_ with Steve’s seed, wet and messy and resplendent, marked up and owned by his cock. The wanton thoughts sent electricity coursing along Steve’s nerves and he felt his groin tighten dangerously where it’d been left completely untended as they dirtied each other up.

Bucky bore down, unrepentantly smothering Steve with his ass and forcing his tongue deeper inside. Steve accommodated as best he could, giving in and finally outright fucking Bucky with his tongue whilst massaging his sensitive rim with his lips as best as he was able. But it was so distracting, the fucked-out sounds Bucky was making, the heady scent of his taint where Steve’s nose was mashed up against, the enticing mental image of Bucky’s stunning body arching and writhing above him as Steve worked him open. Bucky was probably working his own dick, too, and if Steve wasn’t so deliriously pleased with having his mouth and tongue where they were, driving Bucky up the wall, he’d be disappointed about missing out on the sight of Bucky’s hand fisting his lovely cock.

He didn’t even register the click of the bottle opening until Bucky was leaning back and he felt the slick, unforgiving slide of Bucky’s metal hand gliding over the heated flesh of Steve’s neglected cock.

“You ready to get this in me, big guy?” Steve managed to hear through the blood rushing through his ears.

Steve nodded and moved to get Bucky straddling his chest instead of his face, “Yes, God, absolutely,” He panted, sucking in the cool, fresh air now that he wasn’t cooking between those legs- Bucky tended to run just as hot as Steve did, and boy, had that been readily apparent when sandwiched underneath him, surrounded on all sides by that burning skin. His face was prickled with sweat, and a bit of pre-come, startlingly wet where it met the cooler air, “But I want to get you ready this time.”

“Oh, you do, do you?” Bucky smirked, “You think you know what you’re doing down there?”

“What did I just say,” Steve growled, quickly fisting his own dick to gather some lube on his fingers, bringing the digits swiftly up to circle Bucky’s hole, “About underestimating me?”

To drive his point home, he bravely slid his pointer finger in, right up to the knuckle, causing Bucky to gasp and arch, clenching his ass violently around Steve. He feared for a moment that he’d made a grave mistake and hurt Bucky before his friend was sighing contentedly and shoving his ass back, greedily, “Alright, I’ll take your word for it, Rogers. Get my tight ass ready for your dick.”

“Said it yourself, Buck,” Steve said, a bit snottily, as he began to work his finger in and out of Bucky’s wet channel, “You’re easy. Must’ve had a lot of fellas packed up in here- you sure ‘tight’s’ the right word for it, these days?” He punctuated the statement by thrusting a second finger up beside the first, truly testing Bucky’s readiness for the first time.

“Oh, you little-“ Bucky snarled, and Steve regretted the teasing a moment later when Bucky’s inner muscles contracted viciously around his two fingers, almost forcing them out completely, “I’m always tight, you asshole.”

Genuinely curious, Steve pressed further, “Really? Doesn’t, you know, _this_ kinda thing change _that_ kinda thing over time? Women certainly think so.”

“You can call me a slut with a completely straight face one minute but you can’t call anal sex what it is the next? Unbelievable. Maybe you’re still a bit more virginal than I gave you credit for.”

“Well, whose fault would that be then?”

“Hey, just because I got you on the track doesn’t mean it wasn’t _your_ job to run the course.”

“We can’t all be _sluts_ , Bucky.”

Bucky hummed, whining in approval when Steve worked another finger inside, “Alright, _maybe_ it got to the point where things may not have been as _snug_ as they once were, but- _shut up_. But that doesn’t mean you gotta be a cad and bring it up. Have a little class, Rogers,” Bucky flushed a little as he spoke, likely from something other than arousal, Steve would guess, “Serum took care of that problem though.”

Steve felt slightly shamed at that- joking aside, it did seem pretty crude to bring up Bucky’s habit of promiscuity during sex itself, as much as Steve ribbed him about it ordinarily.

As an apology, he scissored his fingers, pulling Bucky’s rim taut and firm around them, and was surprised at how loose he already was. When he let go, the hole felt soft and took its sweet time closing back up.

“ _Mmmm_ ,” Bucky hummed, eyes sliding shut in pleasure, “Yeah, okay, ya ain’t so bad at this. Gimme another.”

Steve felt himself grow even harder, appreciating all over again how Bucky got off on the impossible stretch of his ass, wanting it wider and fuller and splitting him open. Christ, he’d only had Bucky like this a couple times in his long life but he still knew exactly how Bucky wanted it.

Instead of three, Bucky gets four.

“Oh, fuck yes, _Steve_ ,” He moaned airily, face going tight and pinched at the stretch of Steve large fingers forcing him open.

He didn’t even know it was possible to want someone as bad as he wanted this man.

“Oh, _oh_ ,” Bucky gasped as Steve began plowing all of his fingers into him, hoping someday he’d get the chance to see if Bucky could take his whole fist. He thinks Bucky would like that. Would _love_ that. And Steve would love to give it to him.

The thought of Bucky’s rim pulled tight, hot, and swollen around his wrist drove Steve’s arousal to a new level of desperate urgency.

“Fuck, Bucky- I need-“

“Yeah. Yeah, same here.”

“You want to…?”

“I’m gonna sit on it,” Bucky insisted, reaching back to pull Steve fingers out of him, “And you’re going to lie back and take what I give you.”

Steve considered protesting, having been rather set on getting Bucky in bed, or at least on all fours- he has wonderful, crystal clear memories of the last time, Bucky’s ass bouncing and shaking around the girth of his cock, that have gotten his rocks off more than once in the intervening years- but Bucky was already scooting back and gripping the thick root of Steve’s dick with a purposeful gleam in his bright eyes, and suddenly Steve is more than okay with Bucky taking the reins, using Steve’s body as he desired.

It was Steve’s turn to gasp – though it came out like more of a squeak, to his disgrace – as the head of his dick met the fucked open entrance to Bucky’s body, feeling the lush slide of Bucky’s cheeks over it before his hole gave into Bucky’s insistent press and engulfed Steve’s length in one sinful, dirty, wet slide. Steve gripped the rock hard muscle of Bucky’s thighs as the man slid down, accommodating his cock gracefully.

“Hmmm,” Bucky murmured as he squirmed gently around the half of Steve’s dick packed in him, “As good as you remember it, pal?”

Steve realized his eyes had slipped closed it what must have been a truly blissed-out look, enraptured by the hot, miraculous clutch of Bucky’s ass around him. He licked his lips to wet them, “God, Bucky, you’re- you’re amazing.”

Bucky looked pleased as he worked himself up and down over Steve, adjusting his body to the stretch, “Yeah?”

“Like you don’t get that all the time.”

“Perhaps,” Bucky granted, with a quick grin, “But it’s different with you,” Steve heart skipped a few frantic beats at the words as something like delighted hope bubbled somewhere behind his breastbone, “Nothing like knowing your ass is capable of rendering _Captain America_ catatonic.”

“I’m not,” Steve tried to argue, but was silenced by the agonizing weight of Bucky baring all the way down, taking Steve in to the hilt until the sensuous globes of that ass were being cradled by Steve’s hipbones, “O-kay,” He stuttered, “Maybe a little catatonic. If that’s what you call this.”

Bucky laughed, low and dangerous, “Better grab on, Stevie,” He cooed, though the arousal dripping from his tone belayed the condescension, “Cuz the ride’s about to start, and it’s gonna be a wild one,” Steve’s hands went immediately to Bucky’s ass, which bought him a charmed laugh.

Bucky’s heavy cock slapped Steve’s abs when he began to ride him like Steve was a bronco in a fucking rodeo.

The filthy slide of his cock through that tight ring of muscle was mind-numbing. He felt every clench and twitch around him, felt the vibrato of every choked moan and whine Bucky wrested from his own lips as he impaled himself on Steve, alternating between dirty grinding and frantic thrusts; luxuriated in the soft clutch of Bucky’s insides as the worked him over. Everything about Bucky in this moment was positively pornographic, from the way his jaw hung open in gratification to the way his flesh hand pressed against his own navel, like he needed to feel the deep press of Steve’s cock in his belly from the outside to know it was real. It certainly didn’t feel real to Steve, so he covered Bucky’s hand with his own, only a little disappointed that all he could feel was the flex and roll of Bucky’s bunched abs as he took his pleasure.

“God, you’re so big, Steve,” Bucky groaned, and Steve’s hindbrain lit up at the praise, “Yer cock’s perfect. Never had a dick like yours in m’ life,” He sounded punch drunk on Steve’s dick- _dick drunk_? Was that a thing?

“Well,” Steve managed to grunt through his own intoxication, “You’ve had it one other time.”

“Yeah,” Bucky answered with a small smile, though he didn’t even crack open an eye, “I did didn’t I? Ya know, I thought it was just cuz it’d been so long, how you could feel like that in me- like I’d never even taken a dick before you. Wasn’t though. Jesus wept, it’s all just you ain’t it? You and yer incredible fuckin’ unreal cock. You got a _supersoldier_ cock, Steve.”

It was Steve’s turn to laugh, “I should hope so. So do you, you know.”

“What, this old thing?” Bucky purred, finally peeking his gorgeous eyes open to stare Steve down as he pawed his own dick, stroking it almost absentmindedly, though by the wicked hot clench it evoked, Steve could tell the touch was anything but casual. Steve couldn’t help but thrust up into it, getting his dick impossibly deeper. “Oh fuck,” Bucky gasped reaching behind to brace his metal hand on Steve’s knee, “Changed m’mind, keep doin’ that. Keep it up.”

And so Steve did, jamming his hips up and pounding into Bucky from below, relishing every grunt and moan he could punch out of Bucky as he took it gloriously, rocking up and down with Steve’s merciless undulations. He marveled at Bucky’s generally rigid musculature, now lax and boneless above him. The cut of his body was stunningly masculine, even like this, but parts – not unlike that ass Steve remained utterly fixated on – _moved_. Bucky’s pecs, in particular, were stacked and full enough that they jiggled and bounced just right with every collision of their bodies, the erotic visual dousing Steve’s already salacious mind with an almost animalistic carnality. Bucky took it like he was born to get fucked and Steve wanted to ruin Bucky for every other man who dared have the pleasure of seeing this wanton creature come undone on their cock.

Even if they never indulged themselves like this again, Steve would make sure Bucky remembered the way Steve fucked him for the rest of his goddamn life.

“Call me a slut,” He heard Bucky say, all of a sudden, even through the thick haze of pleasure, the abrupt request jerking Steve out of his unforgiving rhythm.

“You- what?”

“You got cotton in yer ears? Call me a slut, Rogers. Tell me again about how used up I am. About how many guys I let fuck me all the time. What a giant whore I am for a big ol’ cock stuffed up in me. _Do it_.”

“You… you can’t be serious, Bucky,” Steve gaped as he drew his pounding to a halt altogether, completely thrown by Bucky’s demands.

Bucky scowled down at him, “What?”

“That’s- those are _horrible_ things to say. I don’t think any of that, you know that right?”

“Christ, you’re so green,” Bucky groaned, his exasperation palpable, “ _No_ , I don’t think you think that. Jesus.”

“Then why’d you want me to…?”

“Because I get off on it, obviously. You didn’t have a problem calling me out earlier.”

“I was being a dick, earlier,” Steve insisted, utterly confounded, “You shouldn’t- you don’t have to think those things about yourself.”

“Good Lord. I _know_ that, Steve. You know me- I do what I want and I always have. I’m not fuckin’ ashamed of that or nothin’. But getting called shit like that gets me hot. It’s a thing. Like an actual thing people like.”

“That’s… that’s _awful_.”

“Don’t kink shame me, Steven. But if you don’t want to, that’s fine. Sorry I ruined the mood,” Bucky sounded grumpy but honestly apologetic, though Steve didn’t have a clue what _kink shame_ meant and he was a little afraid to ask, “You can go back to railing me now.”

“I- I’m sorry, I don’t think I can do that kind of thing, Buck. You know I’ve always been okay with… the way you are.”

“Well, no shit,” Bucky grinned, flexing his ass in a way did wonders for getting the mood back on track, “Your dick’s practically in my colon right now, in case you haven’t noticed.”

Steve groaned, thrusting gently into the welcoming vice of Bucky’s body, “I did notice that.”

Bucky hummed thoughtfully, leaning forward until his face was finally back within kissing range, “Yeah, you were always an astute one,” And then he was kissing Steve, wet and dirty and deep.

Steve caressed Bucky’s broad back as they necked, jerking his hips up reflexively to meet Bucky’s downward thrusts, both very obviously committed to getting back to the business of giving Bucky the business. If Steve looked from this new angle, he could just catch the sight of the top curve of Bucky’s rear as it shook softly with the force of their coupling.

Bucky was going to be the death of him. Everything about him was giving Steve heart palpitations.

The chorus of Bucky’s fucked out noises kicked up a notch, which is how Steve noticed that his bruising pace has increased substantially, the frantic cant of his hips jolting Bucky against his chest as they breathed each other’s air. Bucky was grunting with each jab, eyes shut and face twisted in ecstasy once again. Steve wrapped his arms around him to get a good grip, pulling Bucky down to meet the slap of Steve hips against his jiggling ass.

“Oh, _oh_ , baby, right there,” Bucky groans, curling himself into Steve’s broad chest, “Hit me right there, _Christ_ , shit, your cock is a miracle. Fuck, fuck, _fuck me_ , Steve, _ohhhh_.”

Fuck, his voice did things to Steve. Bucky, so lust drunk and uninhibited, finally, _finally_ , under Steve’s fingers, around his cock, just taking it and so fucking beautiful when he’s being slutty and wanton.

He pounded up into Bucky ruthlessly, until his teeth and finger tips were tingling and the rest of him numb to all feeling outside of the slick, wet heat of Bucky’s ass, soft and tight around him all at once. Bucky’s wail startled him almost out of his blissful trance, concerned for a brief moment before he realizes.

Thick, wet stripes of come splatter between their bodies, hot and sticky where Bucky’s cock has been mashed between their stomachs, dragging against the washboard of Steve’s abs. Bucky’s hair was lank with sweat and fanned out around his head where he’d braced his forehead against Steve’s collarbones, and he could both hear and feel the other man’s jagged, broken panting as he rode it out, twitching and tense around the thick invasion of Steve’s girth.

It’s the fluttering, choking spasms of Bucky’s core around his cock in the aftermath that send Steve over the edge himself. He hadn’t even realized he was so close, but even a supersoldier’s stamina was no match for a screaming, satiated Bucky Barnes. His seed coated Bucky’s insides without shame, the pleasure of marking him with his come drawing his orgasm out for ages and ages, until the sound of his weakly thrusting dick sliding hot and messy through his own spunk sent another rush of arousal down his liquidated spine, and he knew he’d be hard and ready for more in no time, if his erection even went down at all.

It was all over too soon, and Steve wanted to cry at the looming loss of this closeness they’d negotiated between them. Steve had had his chance to come clean to Bucky about his feelings nearly a century ago, and now Bucky had a boyfriend and this one off might be all they’d ever get again.

Steve sighed, mentally and physically bracing himself for Bucky’s withdrawal.

Bucky eventually stirred from his boneless slump, flexing and stretching his abused muscles deliciously over Steve. He rose, bracing his hands against Steve’s shoulders and grinning down at his friend like the cat that caught the canary. He was so painfully resplendent like this, sated and happy, Steve could almost feel the words on the edge of his tongue, begging to be released into the cooling air between them.

_I love you. I want you. Please, please, please stay. Let’s just be like this forever. You’re all I’ll ever need._

There must be some sort of look to Steve, because Bucky’s satisfied smile slipped away far too quickly.

“Hey, what’s up? Tell me you ain’t regrettin’ this already? Give it at least a day, wouldja?”

“I- No, Bucky, that ain’t it. God, you were _fantastic_ ,” Steve rushed to assure him, “Thanks for this, seriously.”

Bucky quirked a brow, “Aw, baby, you think we’re done here? That’s cute, Steve,” He patted Steve’s cheek saucily, which Steve might have taken umbrage to if he weren’t still attempting to process Bucky’s meaning.

“What? You want to- _again_? Right now?”

“Well, yeah. If you think I’m gonna waste an opportunity to go the distance with a fella who can actually match my stamina for once, you’ve got another thing comin’, Rogers. You better believe we’re gonna be goin’ at it like a pair of superhumans in heat for the next couple hours, so you best goddamn brace yourself.”

He twisted his hips over Steve, where he’s still filling him up, causing Steve to suck in a startled breath.

Bucky looked smug and settled, and Steve couldn’t, wouldn’t, had never been able to deny this man anything.

\--

“Oh my God, Bucky,” Steve whispered behind him, breath hot and heavy against Bucky’s back. Almost as hot and heavy at the magnificent weight of his cock driving into Bucky pitilessly, scraping his knees against the carpet and pushing the air from Bucky’s lungs, “You look- fuck, your ass is- _oh my God_.”

“Yeah? Why don’t ya tell me about it, Steve. Tell me how it looks, yer cock fuckin’ me open again.”

“Okay, um,” His friend muttered, painfully and beautifully innocent, even whilst fucking Bucky through the goddamn floor, “It’s- it’s tight. Jesus.”

Bucky hummed in encouragement, dipping his chest toward the carpet to get his ass up and angled just right to get Steve’s jackhammer nailing his prostate dead on, “Go on, then.”

“But it’s also- it’s also, I dunno, fuck, soft?” He made it sound like a question, and Bucky snorted to himself at the inelegance of Steve’s candor, “Like, you’re so open and loose and shit- fuck, _fuck_ , _Bucky_.”

Bucky has never appreciated Steve’s body more than he does right now, how he’s able to _almost_ string sentences together and attempt to give Bucky the dirty talk he’d asked for, without having to pause for breath or even a hitch in the brutally perfect rhythm of his thrusts, filling Bucky up until he thinks he’ll burst open with it. He wanted to think he could taste Steve in the back of this throat, how deep he was inside him, fucking Bucky like he was dying for it, even though he’d already dropped one load into Bucky’s ass.

“You like it loose, Steve?” Bucky prompted, both amused and charmed by Steve’s attempts, “You like it when that huge fuckin’ cock of yours makes me gape after, open n’ slutty for you?”

“And _messy_ ,” Steve agreed, and that plucked just all the right strings on Bucky’s libido. _Yes_ , Steve, tell him more about the mess, Jesus God, “God, the way it leaked out of you. Never seen anything so hot.”

“Can you feel it?” Bucky asked, pushing down the moans his body needed to release under the onslaught and revelation that was Steve’s dick, “Can you feel your come inside me? You really wet me up good back there. So fuckin’ perfect.”

Steve groaned, gratifyingly, “Yeah, can feel it. You’re so wet, Bucky. I’m gonna- I’m gonna give you more. I’m gonna give you all of it. You’ll take it right? You want it,” He gripped Bucky’s hips viciously, pulling Bucky’s body back to meet the slap of his hips against the raw flesh of Bucky’s ass, “And your ass, fuck, it’s just. It fucking _shakes_.”

“ _Yeah_ it does,” Bucky grinned. Steve was a fast learner, he shouldn’t be surprised.

“Oh, _oh_. Fuck, your _hole_. It’s all red n’ sore lookin’, but you’re so _wet_. Feels good, right? You feelin’ good, Buck?”

“I’m feelin’ _so_ good, baby. I love it. I love how you feel packed up inside me, _uhg_. Fuck, Steve. Dirty me up. M’ so _close_.”

“I love-“ Steve’s stuttered, and for an agonizing, gut-wrenching second, Bucky was sure Steve was gonna say- “I love your _ass_ , Bucky, you got no idea. Mother _fucker_.”

“Yeah, doll,” Bucky gasped, having to inject sex into his voice to mask the surge of disappointment, “I know you do.”

\--

Steve had just pulled out the fixings for approximately a dozen grilled cheese sandwiches when he found himself abruptly pinned between his icebox and 240 pounds of beefcake supersoldier.

“This won’t take long,” Bucky tossed him a predatory grin before working his way down Steve’s chest with plenty of lips and teeth.

Bucky tugged the waistband of Steve’s briefs just low enough to expose his cock and dove right in, causing Steve to see stars and nearly drop the butter.

The sight of Bucky licking the white smear of Steve’s come from his lips afterward was downright indecent, but Steve still managed to grit out, “Don’t suppose you still got room for lunch?”

Bucky just laughed and groped Steve’s half hard cock almost fondly.

\--

The food was ready, but something told Bucky his little suckjob detour had derailed Steve’s determined plan to get some calories in them before their fucking continued further.

 _Something_ being Steve’s massive fucking fingers deciding that playing around with Bucky’s fucked out hole took precedence over eating. They were now shoved up inside Bucky’s hot, swollen channel, mucking around the messes Steve’d left there, after he’d managed to pull Bucky’s ruined shorts down just far enough to get his fingers inside. Bucky wasn’t even hard at the moment, but he’d just sighed and let himself be bent over the kitchen counter, tolerating Steve’s precious insatiability. Steve definitely needed to get laid more often- it wasn’t healthy to bottle this shit up.

“How many loads d’you think you can fit?” Steve asked, somehow managing to sound all too wholesome in his curiosity about the volume of come Bucky’s ass was capable of holding.

“Fourteen,” Bucky answered dryly, choosing a number entirely at random, “Really, Steve, how the hell would I know something like that?”

Steve hummed thoughtfully, stroking a finger against Bucky’s soft inner walls, making him shiver, “You want to find out?”

“Have a feeling _you_ want to,” Bucky glanced behind him, sending Steve a half-hearted glare. He couldn’t help but run through the mechanics of such an experiment in his head, and the prospect he imagined seemed messy and more than a little uncomfortable. And probably requiring toys that Steve didn’t even know existed. At least he figured Steve wasn’t implying a gangbang situation, because Bucky sure as shit knew he wouldn’t be into Steve pimping his ass out. If Steve even knew what a gangbang was to begin with.

“You don’t think you’d like it?” Steve asked innocently enough, though something about his casual tone had Bucky suspecting there was more to Steve’s idle curiosity than he was privy to. Steve finger flexed and rubbed gently around inside him, feeling out all the places where he’d fucked Bucky slack and open. It felt good, in a comforting sort of way. No one had ever played with Bucky’s like this before, without any overt intentions, just exploring his body for the sake of it, “You don’t like the idea of laying back and letting me do all the work, coming inside you over and over until your belly’s full of my come?”

“ _Oh_ ,” Bucky sucked in a sharp breath, cock suddenly very much interested in the proceedings. Steve’s careful touches were no longer comforting, but very, very promising.

“Just think about it,” Steve growled, pressing close until Bucky could feel Steve’s nipples grazing the skin of his shoulders. Steve wrapped his unoccupied arm around to pet at the taut flesh of Bucky’s abs reverently, “We’d have you on your back, right? So that the more I gave you the easier it’d be to see you get full with it, stomach stretched tight and round. So fat and full of me, you’d slosh with it when you moved,” It was Steve’s turn to hiss, very apparently caught up in his own fantasy as he pressed harder against Bucky’s navel and humped his dick against Bucky’s waiting ass, “Oh, _oh fuck_ , Bucky.”

“Yeah,” Bucky gasped, arching back into Steve’s fingers, “ _Fuck me_. Fuck me right the fuck now, Rogers.”

“So you do like the idea,” Steve chuckled softly as he lined himself up, not even bothering to remove his fingers first.

\--

Plaster and dust rained down on them when Bucky’s back collided violently with the wall, and he couldn’t help the grunt of pained pleasure gasped into voracious lock of their lips. He had his thighs locked around Steve’s trim waist, struggling to hold himself up against the powerful barrage of Steve’s hips pumping into him. He groaned noisily when Steve wrenched his gorgeous mouth away to dig his teeth into the meat of Bucky’s shoulder, absolutely drawing blood.

Bucky answered Steve’s viciousness with a bit of his own, letting his nails and metal fingers dig in and carve his pleasure into Steve’s shoulders and back as he was rocked by Steve’s implacable cock pounding into him. His unchecked reaction caused Steve to hiss almost angrily, and Bucky grinned, pleased when the pace of Steve’s rutting steadily increased, slamming Bucky harder into the wall. The last fraught time they’d done this, Steve had been terrified of hurting Bucky. Now, Bucky could feel every ounce of Steve’s superhuman strength behind the driving force of his cock boring into Bucky’s body, hard enough to bruise his insides if Bucky himself weren’t a tough motherfucker in his own right.

He grabbed Steve’s ass, hauling him closer, “C’mon, Steve, I know you can do better than that. Pound me like you mean it, would ya?”

Steve growled and Bucky nearly crowed in delighted triumph when his next thrust seemed just short of an attempt to fuck Bucky _through the wall_. He cried out, lacking even a hint of inhibition, at the dual sensation of Steve’s cock striking him particularly deep and brutal and the aching blow of the sturdy wall meeting his back repeatedly and unforgivingly.

“You get off on riling me up, huh Buck? Don’t think I didn’t notice the last few times.”

“Can you blame a guy?” Bucky laughed brokenly as the weight of Steve’s cock shoving into him jarred his speech, “I’ve seen you an action, Steve. When I say I need every ounce of that serum juiced body of yours fucking me until I can’t breathe, I goddamn mean it. Don’t forget I’m juiced, too. I can take everything you got and then some, pal.”

“You seem awful sure of yourself even though you can’t really know what you’re asking for here,” Frustratingly, Steve’s frantic rhythm began to slow, as if fearing he’d already gone too far.

“I promised ya, didn’t I?” Bucky answered, earnestly, trying to calm his frenetic heart enough to sound as genuine as he felt, “I promised that if it was too much, I’d tell ya. You gotta trust me, Steve.”

 Steve’s deep blue eyes bore into Bucky’s own and Bucky looked back, unsure of what Steve could be searching for. Steve just stared for a few silent moments, not even pretending to give Bucky what he wanted as he observed him. After what felt like eons of holding back the stifling urge to clench around the immobile intrusion of Steve’s dick still inside him, Steve finally nodded, resituating them to brace one of his hands on the wall and the other over the small of Bucky’s back and the top of his ass. This left Bucky’s thighs with the brunt of holding himself up, but that was the least of his concerns.

“Ready?” Steve asked, voice low and serious. Bucky only returned it with a nod of his own, firmly planting his own hands of Steve’s shoulders, giving them an encouraging squeeze.

Steve let out a heavy breath as he closed his eyes. A second later Bucky wheezed as the wind of was knocked out if him, holding on for dear life as Steve unleashed on him with everything he had. It was almost impossible in those first few seconds to even remember he had Steve’s dick packed inside him, body consumed by the consciousness of every place where he could feel the rock hard flex of Steve’s muscle as he pounded Bucky into the wall.

 _Literally_ , into the wall.

The other domineering sensation was the feel of plaster and dry wall cracking and fissuring beneath Bucky’s back whilst Steve drove him toward oblivion with his cock and body. Bucky was tensed for the beating as well, and gradually the shock of new awareness abated and his pleasure refocused on the rod of warm steel plowing into him. Combined with the rough stimulus of Steve’s unbridled fucking, the stretch and fullness of Steve’s monstrous cock was nearly enough to send him over the edge.

By why waste this opportunity?

Bucky drew in his own steeling breath and angled his hips just right so that taking Steve’s cock had him nailing his prostate dead on.

Bucky screamed.

\--

They don’t make it to the bed, _again_ , but Bucky couldn’t be bothered by it. How could he be, when Steve wants him so bad he just has to have him now, wherever they happen to find themselves. Bucky would gladly add to his growing collection of carpet burns if it meant feeling like the center of Steve’s fucking universe for just a little bit longer.

\--

Bucky had shoved Steve toward and bed, laughed when he stumbled back as his knees collided with the frame, but Steve refused to bitch about it. Because a second later, in all his naked, beefy glory, Bucky had turned his back to Steve, climbed atop him and lowered himself down on Steve’s cock, moaning and grinding his ass as he took Steve back inside his body. The breach was gloriously smooth, eased by the copious slick, come, and sweat covering the back of Bucky’s thighs and ass, making him a slippery, sloppy mess just about everywhere south of his tailbone. He was an absolute vision.

Steve reached out as soon as Bucky had him fully sheathed, gripping Bucky’s ass and pulling the cheeks apart to get a look at the place where his cock disappeared up inside his soft channel, running a finger over the taxed, puffy rim reverently. He groaned when Bucky flexed his glutes around his cock, glancing back over his shoulder and grinning, unbearably smug.

Bucky didn’t stop there, arching his back and bracing himself on Steve’s legs still hanging off the bed. That talented tongue peeked out to wet his lips, and he purred, “Take a break, baby. Just sit back and _watch_.”

\--

Bucky’s ass felt used and raw in a way he remembered intellectually, if not viscerally. A large part of him never thought he’d feel this way again, not with what it takes to make him feel any sort of ache short of battle wounds these days. There are still holes in his memory the size of entire nation states at this point in his hard won recovery from Hydra’s mind wipes, but he’d been reasonably sure of this fact.

Steve is every sort of impossible he’s been craving.

He was on his back in bed finally, Steve fucking him slow and measured but deep, with Bucky’s legs thrown over his shoulders and ankles twined behind his neck and the position had him feeling beautifully supplicant and possessed in ways no other man on this earth would be capable of. Bucky gets off on taking men into his body regularly, but he never feels as thoroughly _taken_ as he does in this moment.

Steve’s braced on his forearms above him for leverage, panting heavily and brokenly like he, too, was feeling just as worn out and dazed as Bucky. It took a lot more than hours battle to wear them out nowadays, but Bucky could tell Steve’s body is taxed and overcome by hours and hours of meeting Bucky’s body’s demands and exceeding them gratefully. Bucky moaned, soft and shattered by Steve’s tireless cock, feeling full and gloriously fucked with Steve stuffed so deep in his guts, but still wanted more. After taking Steve’s dick so many times in so short a span, Steve fit perfectly inside him and Bucky was nearly sobbing with want. He flexed his hands against the headboard, hearing the wood creak and groan under the strain of his metal grip, but forced the rest of him to remain lax and pliant, soft and open for Steve to wreck, and completely surrendered to it. To him.

Steve’s eyes were screwed shut in what Bucky might construe as pain if it weren’t for his friend’s dazzlingly broken grunts and whines as he fucks into the softness of Bucky’s body. The backs of Bucky’s thighs and ass felt slick and coated in the mess they’d made, and his hole was so open and loose by now that the muscle there couldn’t even twitch and flutter around the electric feel of Steve’s cock sliding effortlessly into his body. It’s all he could manage to compress the abused muscles of his pelvic floor, tightening himself around Steve on the outstroke, his efforts rewarded with breathy moans that had Bucky squirming softly around the implacable girth of Steve’s cock pressed inside him.

He wanted this man more than _air_.

Steve grunted again, this time in concentration as he shifted his angle, searching. Bucky’s breath caught, knowing what Steve was searching for and his thighs clenched in anticipation. If Steve was actively angling for Bucky’s prostate now, he must be getting about ready to blow himself.

“Stevie,” Bucky breathed, “You close, baby?”

“God, Bucky, _God_ ,” Steve gasped, continuing to work his cock around inside Bucky, seeking the spot that would push Bucky past the point of no return. After all this stimulation, he’d come untouched for sure.

Steve’s arms slid under Bucky’s back, clutching his straining shoulders and pressing their chests together and that’s it. That’s the spot.

“Oh, _God_ , _right there_ , Steve. Fuck, _oh fuck_ , baby, gonna come. Tha’s it, _right_ _there_ , _right_ _there_ , _there_ ,” Bucky was howling now, doing everything in his power to work himself back on Steve’s dick and get it dragging over the swollen hub of his prostate, feeling the coil of arousal in his gut wind tighter and tighter with each pass, “Steve, Christ, _Steve_. _Fuck_!”

He felt the movement of Steve’s thick, gorgeous arms around him but his eyes must have closed without him knowing, lost in the whorl of pleasure- he’s _so close_. A moment later, his legs were being moved, slid off of Steve’s broad, magnificent shoulders and wrapped around his torso, and he curled them tight and fast without hesitating, pulling Steve deeper onto him, into him.

He felt something brush against his jaw and opened his eyes.

Steve’s staring right into them when he does, and Bucky knew it was Steve’s hands, clutching his face as he continued to fuck the life out of Bucky’s body. He wanted to cry. He wanted to scream. But all he can do is come and come, his entire body clenching and contracting around all that is Steve, but their eyes remained locked despite being overwhelmed to the point of agony by his climax.

It’s like a small fissure is suddenly fractured open inside his mind.

The sensation of being on his back, Steve between his legs. Not _this_ Steve. The Steven Rogers Bucky Barnes fell in love with before he even knew what love was. The raw, debilitating force of a littler, scrawny Steve fucking him, coming inside him, and the wet, sticky feel of taking that part of Steve as his own. A piece of Steve no one else would ever possess but Bucky. He hadn’t forgotten the moment or the act, but he hadn’t remembered a very important piece of the brilliant, cherished puzzle that was his tangled, beautiful life with Steve and his heart breaks open inside his chest all over again.

 _He’d promised himself_.

\--

Steve woke up the next morning, deliriously sated and something like happy, despite the fact that he knew the other side of the bed would be cold and empty when he reached out to check. He was still disappointed, but not at all surprised when he opened his eyes and found his prediction painfully accurate. Bucky was long gone.

He attempted to go about his morning as usual. For all their exertions, they’d actually gone to bed at a reasonable hour, after having spent the greater part of the afternoon entwined in all ways imaginable. In the end, it was early enough to catch his regular run with Sam, who probably wasn’t even awake at this early hour. Steve pulled together some sort of breakfast and drug himself into the living room to eat on the couch as he cursorily checked his phone for new emails.

“Captain Rogers,” FRIDAY chimed in suddenly, “I took the liberty of pausing your programming yesterday after you and Sergeant Barnes were,” To her credit, she only paused for half a beat, “Distracted. Shall I queue up where you left off?”

Steve let himself feel grateful to the computer program for having had the decorum not to interrupt them in the moment, before the misery rolled back in like an angry fog, “Sure, FRIDAY, that’d be great.”

He only watched a few minutes before calling out again, “FRIDAY, about yesterday.”

“You and Sergeant Barnes can expect me to maintain the utmost discretion, Captain. All logs from Avengers’ suites are confidential exempting cases of emergency. I see no reason to alert Boss about you and the Sergeant’s private affairs,” She paused again, more deliberately this time, “Though if I may. This may be certain aspects of Boss’ programming speaking, but I feel compelled to mention: way to thoroughly and comprehensively tap that, Captain.”

Steve sighed feelingly before answering dryly, “Thanks, I guess. Can you tell me what time Sergeant Barnes left this morning?”

“The Sergeant departed your suite at approximately 11:32pm and left the Tower premises shortly thereafter.”

Steve hummed to himself. So Bucky hadn’t just relocated to his own small apartment in the tower. He must have gone back to his own flat in Hell’s Kitchen then. He debated the idea of texting Bucky to check in before dismissing the thought immediately. He’d get ahold of his friend later, but for now it might be for the best if they gave each other some space. Yesterday had been intense, but Steve felt there was little hope of it actually changing anything between them.

But maybe. It was possible, right?

He left the messaging app quickly and cycled briskly through his various social media obligations, scrolling through each superficially for any outstanding updates and notifications he should be aware of. Tony, in particular, had the nasty habit of tagging Steve in outrageous posts and tweets just to get a rise out of him.

He paused on Instagram, where a notification told him Bucky’s alias had been tagged in a post earlier this morning.

The picture was of Bucky kissing another man’s cheek, the pair haloed by the early morning sunrise over the sea east of JFK, Julien holding a large Starbucks cup and grinning widely with an arm slung over Bucky’s shoulders. It was captioned ‘look who decided to meet me at the airport at early ass o’clock! @itsnadezhdabitch #redeye #NoThankYou #uhg #coffeefirstkisseslater #mercibaby #boyfriend #love #GaysDoItBetter #myhunk #justlookatthatface #orthatass #nycdrag #nyc #sunrise’.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, like I said, basically a steaming heap of filthy, naughty, indulgent debauchery with a garnish of pining thrown in for flavor. Still no plot to speak of. It was actually supposed to be a bit longer based on my outline (a few more scenes during that little sex montage), but I actually burnt myself out on writing porn during the three days I spent working on this. It was exhausting.
> 
> Fun fact: Bucky in Daisy Dukes was actually the initial spark of inspiration that got me started on this entire Queer!Bucky trainwreck. Now you know.
> 
>  
> 
> **  
> **  
> A few comments and clarifications on the main story (Babe, You Always Knew I Was Dangerous):  
>   
> 
> -As you may have noticed, there was no final resolution of Steve and Bucky’s relationship here. Quite the opposite, really. That will come to a head in the full story.
> 
> -The story will be AU: Canon Divergent after Age of Ulton, but the events surrounding Civil War will be prominent.
> 
> -Which means, yes, there will be actual plot, and plenty of it, to varying degrees. Sometimes more than one.
> 
> -The main plot will flesh out the conflict established and hinted at between Steve and Bucky outside of the bedroom, answer a lot of questions, and honestly, dive a lot deeper into Bucky’s character and experiences (along with Steve’s, at times) than is likely apparent in this preview. If any of the meager plot here seemed rushed or characterization seemed stilted, this is likely the cause (unless it’s me, in which case… anyone know where I can find a beta?).
> 
> -It will be long, if my 30,000 word pure smut teaser is of any indication.
> 
> \- Fair Warning: There will be a LOT more smut. Not all of it will be Steve/Bucky (or Bucky/Steve). Various other pairings will include but will not be limited to Bucky Barnes/Howard Stark, Bucky Barnes/Wade Wilson, Sam Wilson/Bucky Barnes/OMC, and of course, Bucky/OMCs, but rarely any that require more character development than for the sake of illustrating Bucky’s sexuality throughout his life. Some of these scenes will be plot driven enough to be included in the main body of the story, others will be posted as story adjacent porny installments, because Bucky is kind of a slut and like hell I’m going let that porn opportunity pass. There will also be minor or background relationships, some of which feature Steve, that will not be explored via smut.
> 
> -Bucky may bottom exclusively in this fic, but that will not be the case in the full story, rest assured.
> 
> \- As of this final teaser going live I am also posting the first chapter of the main story to wet the whistles of anyone interested, since you were kind enough to sit through this PWP disaster. There actually isn’t a whiff of porn to be found therein. I know, I’m as shocked as you are.
> 
>  **Side Note:** In all seriousness, if anyone knows where I could find an experienced beta who will tolerate my fandom rustiness, I would really appreciate it.
> 
>  
> 
> For anyone interested in that kind of thing, each of the scenes in this teaser were tonally influenced by a song.  
> Teaser 1 Pre-War Steve/Bucky: Satellite by Nickelback  
> Teaser 2 WWII Steve/Bucky: Good Graces, Bad Influence by The Spill Canvas  
> Teaser 3 Modern Steve/Bucky: Thick Thighs (feat. Latrice Royale) by William

**Author's Note:**

> This work was an excerpt from a much, MUCH longer work in progress focusing on Queer Bucky Barnes. I'm posting now to get a feel for where my writings at, since it's been about 10 years since I've posted any works of fanfiction. The main story will be INCREDIBLY smutty, and since I don't have a beta currently, I'm hoping for feedback. There will be three porn chapters posted by the end, all part of this teaser. 
> 
> So, obviously, con crit is extremely welcome. Thanks for checking it out!


End file.
